this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2026
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[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

And then I'm ordering eggs and hash browns at 3 am, will proceed to drink 13 cups of bad, weak coffee with excessive amounts of cream and sugar, and I will like it

[–] PolarKraken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Here's a fun way to learn about an American you just met. Take em to Waffle House!

If they're a judgmental asshole, never speak to them again, trust me. Let them get back to their $23 hamburger spot that charges for subpar ketchup they call "gourmet".

No one worth a moment of my time shits on Waffle House or feels uncomfortable there. Not one person.

[–] remotedev@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 month ago

Hell I grew up in southern California and have wafflehouse stories from the handful of times I've been to one when visiting family in the south.

[–] brbposting@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I can tell you the license plate numbers of all six cars outside. I can tell you that our waitress is left-handed and the guy sitting up at the counter weighs two hundred and fifteen pounds and knows how to handle himself. I know the best place to look for a gun is the cab of the gray truck outside, and at this altitude, I can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking. Now why would I know that? How can I know that and not know who I am?

[–] EvenOdds@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 month ago

I really want to watch that movie again now. Thanks for the quote!

[–] arrow74@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Looking for an exit?

They're all exactly the same. If you've been in a waffle house once you've been in them all

[–] Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Exactly. You enter, turn left, enter another door, and the counter is on your right. A thin woman in her 40's that has definitely seen someone die tells you to sit wherever you want, and treats you significantly better than you deserve.

[–] PolarKraken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 month ago

Pure poetry. There aren't many things to celebrate in the US anymore, but they'll never take Waffle House from us. A true national treasure.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

And then you treat that lady right, you thank her for your hash browns and your 2am coffee, and you enjoy your evening because this was the best choice of the night

[–] qevlarr@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

That movie is so fucking good, now I want to watch it again. Thanks for reminding me this masterpiece exists

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hot take but I preferred Waffle House III

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

The villains are always natural disasters but the Waffle House always wins.

[–] Tiger@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago

I really wish they hadn’t killed off the girl in the sequel, she was amazing

[–] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I watched a youtube a while back that posited a version of the Bourne Identity where we see the whole thing from Jason's perspective only, learning things as he learns them, going on that journey with him. And it honestly feels like the version of the movie that should have been, but never was.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdcSFsQRsnc

[–] scttgard@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do not mess with Waffle House staff, they have seen some shit and you would just be encouraging them to release pent up frustrations.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

I heard about a hostage situation at waffle house once. Except the staff were the hostage-takers.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago

This young man is looking to get out of a waffle house if a crisis arises. I only go to a waffle house if a crisis arises.

[–] OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

“If it’s your first time at Waffle House, you have to fight.”

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 month ago

Do not scorn the Waffle House, for it fed me when I was drunk and ratty-assed, and so it will feed you.

[–] Nanowith@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As a European? Why is it waffles that cause the behaviour I've heard about this place?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

It's the only place open after the bars close and the food is still remarkably cheap

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Weak. You sit there and know the waitress has stabbed someone before and if you're pleasant to her you'll be fine.

Fuck I miss waffle house. Used to go there after nights out all the time when I lived in their range

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] PolarKraken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The fuck? Waffle House is a goddamn delight. Things occasionally go off the rails 2-3 AM or whatever thanks to rambunctious drunks. By and large it's efficient, cheap, consistently delicious "greasy spoon" diner food. Made by competent folks who don't take shit.

Anthony Bourdain loved it, I mean really what more do ya need to know.

[–] khannie@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Waffle House is definitely on my bucket list. Anywhere that isn't rambunctious at those hours isn't worth eating in at those hours.

[–] PolarKraken@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 month ago

Cheers! As long as you know what you're in for, you're gonna love it.

[–] BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Fiery@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

One of the Jason Bourne movies, I think the first one but not 100% sure

[–] TheColonel@reddthat.com 3 points 1 month ago

I’m sure. It’s the first one.

[–] FauxLiving@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Waffle House's PR team is tougher than kitchen staff it seems