this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2025
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Shitty Ask Lemmy

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[–] Tenderizer78@lemmy.ml 6 points 3 days ago

spoilerThere were never any WMD's.

[–] klemptor@startrek.website 4 points 3 days ago

SpoilerHe was dead all along

[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

My wife has a joke about The Universal Spoiler, which is "They die". Apparently it applies to a lot of movies in one way or another.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 4 points 3 days ago

I have a similar joke but it's the good guys win.

[–] Hylactor@sopuli.xyz 5 points 3 days ago
[–] sentient_loom@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago

spoilerhe dies

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

When I was a teenager, I was seeing X-Men 3 in theaters. A man comes in late and sits next to me. He points at Jean Grey and asks:

Spoiler"Did she kill the professor yet?"

And, the answer was, no, that did not happen yet. 😤

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I trolled some random kid in the theater by telling them DJ was Rey's father, which he isn't

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That spoiler does happen in X3 though lol. But I remember telling some young relatives that Kylo Ren was Luke Skywalker after Force Awakens came out. He was despondent. I really regretted making the joke. Like he was just straight up laying on the floor staring at the ceiling. I thought it was obvious he wasn't Luke so I thought it was a funny thing to say.

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 days ago

On my way out of TLJ, I considered shouting "REY TURNS TO THE DARK SIDE!"

[–] Albbi@lemmy.ca 4 points 3 days ago

SpoilerThe bank robbers escaped by releasing themselves to the police and saying they were hostages.

spoilerHis wife's killer was already dead

[–] limer@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 days ago

spoilerThe butler did it

[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 days ago

She makes shoes

[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago

The dude does or doesn't get the girl

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

SpoilerIt was the dog