I once ran a credit card for a Richard P. Orefice.
Dick Pee Orifice, hahaha
this post was submitted on 27 Oct 2025
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Named epiphany
Family name foukeem
Goes by phanie
The name tag said phanie foukem
Fanie fuckem fanie fuckem fanie fuckem
I felt like I was having a fever dream.
I don't really remember terrible names, and I don't like to mock people for things they didn't get to choose for themselves. However, one of the best names I've ever come across was a kid called Max Godbolt.
This just made me do a quick search and now I have learned that the Godbolt compiler explorer isn't just some cool name, but actually the last name of the guy who made it (Matt Godbolt)
I worked at a gym doing sign ups and check ins (before it was all fully automated), and quickly lost count. One that still sticks out to me though is Thomas T. Thomas. Pretty sure the middle name was also Thomas.
One of my oldest friends had a dad named Thomas. He apparently wanted to name his child Thomas, but the mother disagreed, so he demanded that the middle name of that and any future children be Thomas.
These people annoy me!
I've been doing my family tree, and part of my family is from West Wales. There's a Thomas Thomas, named after his grandfather, and his father is Philip Thomas, who was named after his grandfather. They've also sprinkled a handful of boys named John Thomas through the later generations, with one being named after his own brother! 😫
To make things worse, there's another family who are around the same age as Thomas Thomas, and the two Thomas (Thomases?) married women with the same first name, and gave their daughters the same first name too! They even live in the same small town! 😳😅
Was the brother lost or were there just two people walking around the house with the same name, doomed to be confused every time someone summoned one of them?
No, they weren't quite that bad 😂
The older one passed away as a child, so they named the younger one after him, about a year later. I'm thinking that the name might be unlucky though, the younger one died in the first world war, not long after having two children. Neither of his kids were named John, and they both lived long, happy lives...
Major Major Major.
I've met a Khaleesi... poor child. Forever associated with the dumpster fire that was S8
At least Leesi kind of works as a nickname that isn’t as obviously GOT
Matthew Tress. Mattress.
That's amazing 👏
Oh boy. Let's see I went to school with:
- Stephen Hoar
- Jeremy Stankee
- Fuk Train
I knew a woman whose last name was hoar and whose first name was analogous to Tifanibel- two cutesy first names spelled creatively and jammed together.
Bonk. Not a nickname, it was written exactly like that on the attendance list.
Atticus Finch (from How to kill a mockingbird) for a girl.
If there only was a cool girl character in that movie 🤔
I taught in urban areas for about 25 years. I’ve lost count of the numerous interesting names I’ve had to learn to pronounce and spell.
I didn't meet the man but I walked by a jeweller in paris named Long Phung, which in my native language translate to Long Balls.
Guy at work has last name of Raper 😳
My first and last names could not be more white bread. Middle name? Black as it gets. Had to change the email on my resume because I couldn't get a job.
Richard Glick, or Dick Glick= dick lick.
It took me a moment to realize I had no idea if I ever met someone with an awful/stupid name. Pretty sure I've met a few but oddly (?) I don't care much about names.
I can remember a French publisher whose publishing house (back in the early XX century) was named after himself: 'Louis Conard' which is almost funny as, in French, 'connard' means 'moron' or 'jerk' (but can also very easily be meaner, depending the intention) and I remember the very first time I purchased one of their books (a volume of Flaubert's correspondence, if I recall correctly) I wondered for a moment, had I been in his shoes, if I would have changed my legal name to add the missing 'n', but that's about it ;)
You know a person can't be responsible for the name assigned by his parental units.
I knew a kid with the last name of Gussler who joined the Navy right out of high school.
Sorry, deleted because easily Googleable. It was a terrible name though. Also, though she was a nice kid, she seems to have become a shitty adult.... Huh, I wonder what she'd think of me 🧐