this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2025
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This was shared with me by a well-meaning Trump-hating lib boomer in my life and is a pretty perfect little example of why this "Borowitz Report" sucks shit. It's a fully libbed up wannabe Onion but it has absolutely no sauce.

The point the article is going for is "ha ha look at how unhinged Trump's UN speech was, what an absurd and terrible guy he is" but the comparison point it picks is Hugo Chavez's 2006 speech to the UN. This made me curious as to what exactly it was he said back in 2006. A quick little jaunt over to NATOpedia got me some choice quotes:

"The devil came here yesterday, and it smells of sulfur still today, this table that I am now standing in front of."

followed by

"Yesterday, ladies and gentlemen, from this rostrum, the President of the United States, the gentleman to whom I refer as the devil, came here, talking as if he owned the world."

and

Chávez also said that President Bush "...came [to the General Assembly] to share his nostrums to try to preserve the current pattern of domination, exploitation and pillage of the peoples of the world."

Bars, no lies detected, etc. Certainly not "batshit." And of course Borowitz picked this example comparing Trump to Chavez while Trump is currently in the process of trying to manufacture a Gulf of Tonkin style incident with Venezuela.

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[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 40 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Chávez also said that President Bush "...came [to the General Assembly] to share his nostrums to try to preserve the current pattern of domination, exploitation and pillage of the peoples of the world."

Libs: :smuglord: "Well you see, our domination of the world doesn't exist, but if it did, it would be justified because we're superior to everyone else in the world"

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 38 points 6 months ago (2 children)

The lib who showed this to me suggested that the only reason Chavez had a problem with Bush owning the world was because he wanted to own it instead.

The well known worldwide Venezuelan imperial project that definitely exists, y'see.

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 30 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The well known worldwide Venezuelan imperial project that definitely exists, y'see.

It's funny, zionist libs say this about Hamas. "If Israel didn't exist, Hamas would want to take over the world!"

Insane belief system.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 26 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The liberal mind cannot comprehend a non-hegemonizing worldview

[–] huf@hexbear.net 22 points 6 months ago
[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 24 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

was because he wanted to own it instead.

Our demands most moderate are - we only want the Earth

  • James Connolly
[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"The devil came here yesterday, and it smells of sulfur still today, this table that I am now standing in front of."

If I recall correctly the UN hall laughs when he says this.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Sounds fun, I'll have to actually watch it

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 19 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (4 children)
[–] muad_dibber@lemmygrad.ml 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That fucking rules. God damn Chavez was the greatest.

[–] CommCat@hexbear.net 7 points 6 months ago

He really was great, people don't underestimate the important role he played for the International Leftist movement. The Left still felt defeated with the collapse of the Soviet Union, and still living in the period of "End of History". Sure there were movements like the Zapatistas, but they were hidden in the little area, doing mostly local things, but no real Leftist held state power and defied US Empire, until Chavez came along.

[–] AernaLingus@hexbear.net 8 points 6 months ago

peltier-laugh

also, TIL nostrum:

  1. A medicine or remedy in conventional use which has not been proven to have any desirable medical effects.

  2. (by extension) An ineffective but favorite remedy for a problem, usually involving political action.

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 4 points 6 months ago

That's some good shit

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 32 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Seriously though, that particular award should go to the zionist entity representative who brought a small shredder and shred UN charter, which is actually formal basis on which his entity even exist. He also wear yellow star of David on his suit to suggest empty UN resolutions against entity are like holocaust.

[–] sexywheat@hexbear.net 7 points 6 months ago

Watching him accuse the UN of shredding the charter while literally himself shredding the charter in front of them while giving that speech lowkey drove me insane.

[–] DrMartinu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 28 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'd argue gadaffi held the belt. Dude went on for 90 minutes tearing up papers and shit

[–] buckykat@hexbear.net 29 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I assume he was also completely correct

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 28 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Gaddafi was good at being correct yet maintaining an entirely unhinged delivery of the information.

[–] Kopfrkingl@hexbear.net 4 points 6 months ago

Can I get a tldr of Trump's speech? I'm not listening to that man.