this post was submitted on 06 May 2025
723 points (99.2% liked)

iiiiiiitttttttttttt

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you know the computer thing is it plugged in?

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[–] SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 47 points 4 days ago (2 children)

"Director of Finance"

Probably makes 6 figures but doesn't understand how walpapers work.

[–] Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 16 points 4 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Real talk it was probably Heather works under her and asked "hey what do I do when a large picture of mustard appears on my screen" and Director Of Finance said "reboot and if it's still there I'll let so-and-so know from IT, then emailed it off to so-and-so from IT directly instead of entering a ticket

Edit: actually reviewing the screenshot it looks like this email was to the ticketing system so Director of Finance appears to have followed the correct prcoess

[–] supernight52@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This is almost guaranteed to be correct.

*typo

[–] turtlesareneat@discuss.online 7 points 4 days ago (3 children)

My headcannon is more like, Director stops by and wants to know why Heather is looking at mustard bottles again, she has been warned about this, you see. She suddenly jumps and says "Oh, it uh, I was just working and then this happened." Well that's not fair is it? It's not like she was intentionally looking at mustard again

And that's the thing about IT, we save people's jobs. Even freaks. Blame us, Heather, our shoulders are broad.

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[–] glitch1985@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago

You know they have one of those calculators on their desk with the spool of paper so they can check the math.

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It should have been sorted by penis.

[–] tehBishop@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago (2 children)

"there is no arrange by penis option"

What was that called already? Can't remember the name!

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

The website is down.

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[–] MissingInteger@lemm.ee 20 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

Since this seems like a preventable issue for me, I wanted to disable the Set As Desktop Background… option in Firefox.
That was not as straightforward as I thought it would be:

  • Settings: nope
  • about:config: nope
  • userChrome.css: The Internet, and LLMs tell you yes, but actually nope

What you have to do is create a policies.json file and put that somewhere…
Here is the deeply buried site from Mozilla about that. There you will find where to put it and all the options.

For this problem a short policies.json with the following content is enough:

{
  "policies": {
    "DisableSetDesktopBackground": true
  }
}

Why did I do this in the middle of the night instead of browsing ich_iel or I dunno sleeping. Who knows…

[–] AndyTheAbsurd@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago

In a corporate environment where you care about such things, you really want to disable the functionality of the user setting the background in the operating system, not in a specific application. Otherwise, you're going to have to track down every application that includes this functionality, figure out how to disable it it in that application, and find a way to apply that change to every PC. (Microsoft's Photos app, for example, can set pictures as either background or lock screen.)

[–] Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 3 days ago

Instead of locking down the the ability to set the wallpaper via Firefox, just set a static image as the wallpaper via GPO. A company logo or something. Then it will apply at every restart.

[–] magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 120 points 5 days ago (6 children)

Leave Heather alone. There’s nothing wrong with this desktop background. Please refrain from remote connecting to her computer in the future.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 58 points 5 days ago (7 children)

This is reminiscent of an absolute classic video.

If you are not familiar with a story about penis-arranged icons, I recommend giving it a watch.

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 17 points 5 days ago (1 children)

If you haven't, please watch the original, full video! It's hilarious from beginning to end...

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[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 35 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Why do webbrowsers, file managers, always have the option "set as your desktop background" in a easy to accidentally click place in the context menu? No, i add it myself to the "backgrounds" folder if i care.

[–] Tikiporch@lemmy.world 40 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Are you saying you've never been shopping online, saw a shapely bottle of mustard, and then wanted to set it as your desktop background as quickly as possible? Why, it's the next best thing to having a framed photo of the sexy, squeezable condiment with low calories and delectable flavor.

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[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 78 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Heather doesn't lock her computer when she walks away. Don't be like Heather.

[–] NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de 65 points 5 days ago (13 children)

It sounds far more likely to me that she right-clicked on some image file and picked "Set as desktop background".

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 5 points 3 days ago

MUSSSSTAARRRRRRRRRRRD

[–] ramble81@lemm.ee 48 points 5 days ago (3 children)

And this is why we have a GPO that locks the background to a corporate image.

[–] x00z@lemmy.world 17 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I think it's nice if people can set their own background picture. They can put a picture of their pets or family members which lowers the stress.

A better policy would be to hire people who can actually do basic things with the thing they'll be working 8 hours a day with.

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[–] Kissaki@programming.dev 12 points 4 days ago (1 children)

When you're working for Heinz, is it a mustard bottle?

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[–] whodatdair@lemmy.blahaj.zone 34 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Ctrl + Alt + Down

Now your bottle is ready to dispense delicious mustard

[–] bob_lemon@feddit.org 9 points 4 days ago

Only on laptops with Intel graphics where IT hasn't deactivated the unnecessary utility that comes with them.

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 43 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (6 children)

That font in the signature, the fax into, the mustard!!!

... and last but not least, how the icon placement accentuates the natural curves of that mustard bottle ...

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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[–] ironhydroxide@sh.itjust.works 45 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Here's my new "you left your computer unlocked" image

[–] almost1337@lemm.ee 16 points 5 days ago (4 children)

My favorite was to screenshot the desktop, set that as the background, then move everything on it to a different folder.

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[–] entwine413@lemm.ee 32 points 5 days ago (4 children)

We used to do this stuff to people who would leave their computers open, or flip the screen upside down.

It was a pretty benign way to teach people to lock their damn computers when they left.

[–] Soapbox1858@lemm.ee 21 points 5 days ago (2 children)

I used to take a screenshot of the desktop, set it as the wallpaper. Then hide all the desktop icons and set the taskbar to auto hide.

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[–] irelephant@programming.dev 13 points 5 days ago (4 children)

Microsoft removing CTRL - ALT and arrrow to turn the screen is a crime.

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[–] Klear@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Crop to selection in Paint.net: ctrl + shift + x
Set as wallpaper in IrfanView: ctrl + shift + x

Happens to me all the fucking time.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 4 days ago

Because you obviously need a shortcut to set a wallpaper lmao.

[–] solsangraal@lemmy.zip 23 points 5 days ago (1 children)

and of all the amazing mustards available, she had to get stuck with one of the most shitty vinegary last-resort-only option

[–] Zizzy@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 5 days ago (2 children)

As a mustard lover, heinz isnt even close to the actual worst one, which is the whole foods brand mustard. Its made with apple cider and it is revolting. The best widely available yellow mustard to just grab in a store is plochman's.

[–] SmoothLiquidation@lemmy.world 13 points 5 days ago (9 children)

There are so many awesome fancy mustards out there, but if I want the ballpark standard yellow mustard, I usually just go for French’s. It’s the same principle with ketchup. When I want ketchup I just want Heinz. If I go to a restaurant and they are all proud of their “house made” ketchup, it is probably going to be too sweet or tomatoy or whatever. Just give me what I grew up with and don’t mess with it.

That said my wife has been making mustard at home recently and it is amazing. It’s not yellow mustard but a tangy grainy mustard that is great.

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[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 20 points 5 days ago
[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (12 children)

Are mustards in America classified by their colour instead of French, Dijon, English, Blow-Off-The-Top-Of-Your-Head, etc?

[–] Djinn_Indigo@lemm.ee 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)

They're labeled by type; one of those types happens to just be called "yellow." It's smooth and vinegary. Good on hot dogs and burgers.

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[–] Sixtyforce@sh.itjust.works 9 points 4 days ago

No, yellow mustard is the cheap standard stuff. The rest exist in NA too.

[–] irelephant@programming.dev 6 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Not american, but in america I'm pretty sure mustard is just yellow dye.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 3 days ago

Heh heh, Americans will finish posting their “British food” memes and then go back to squirting flavourless yellow paste onto a bag of par-boiled ground pigdick.

[–] sudo@programming.dev 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

There are zero artificial ingredients in yellow mustards.

Vinegar, Water, Mustard Seed, Salt, Tumeric, Paprika.

All the color is from tumeric.

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