14
Didn't have that on my bingo card for this year, but it's on brand. A big part of The Onion's MO is just riding out the insanity and inject a little of their own.
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Folks, huge W today. I was hanging out with my parents today and my mother was scrolling her feed, commenting out loud about everything she saw when she came across some autoplag content. “This is fake!” she said, and I could not be prouder. Not just because she IDed the slop, but because it meant she at least has a better brain than my trumper family members that habitually repost trumper slop.
Cherry on top: she showed me a text chain where she was trolling a “my phone died, this is my new number” scammer.
Got recommended a video from a friend, and its a damn good sneer at the state of YouTube sponsorships:
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big walmart is watching you.
https://old.reddit.com/r/walmart/comments/1gqphel/body_cameras_for_front_end/
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I made a sneer about moving from Twitter to yet another Jack Dorsey social network, but after looking into it he apparently left Bluesky and joined Musk's team instead, because of moderation options. Geez, maybe I should sign up. But creating and keeping track of new accounts to sites is a pain in the aaaaaaassssss.
Bluesky is backed by a cryptocurrency venture capitalists, which makes me nervous: https://bsky.social/about/blog/10-24-2024-series-a -- but in the same press release they reassure people that they're not about to go all NFT (Non-Fun Tokens) just because of their backers.
This does not change the fact that the Bluesky app and the AT Protocol do not use blockchains or cryptocurrency, and we will not hyperfinancialize the social experience (through tokens, crypto trading, NFTs, etc.).
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Dorsey jumping ship's about as good a reason as any to jump to Bluesky, especially considering Twitter's currently haemorrhaging users from the one-two-three punch of the AI training, the crippled blocking and THE ELECTION^tm^.
By my guess, the AI training is probably doing the most damage - that one's prompting artists to bolt for the exits, and if Tumblr's NSFW ban taught me anything, its that if the artists start leaving, they're gonna start taking their fans with them.
Yea, the artists are about half the reason for me to be on that site to begin with.
This is pure gut instinct, but I suspect Twitter's probably gonna die sometime during Trump's term - the banks which funded Musk's takeover consider it their worst deal since the Great Recession, and the rapid exodus of users is gonna further cripple Twitter's ability to attract advertising revenue.
Part of me suspects we're gonna see Twitter getting banned somewhere during Trump's term as well, a la Musk's tangle with Brazil.
that article is pure dopamine
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Four Passengers Die in Burning Tesla After Electronic Doors Seemingly Won't Open
I always had a hunch Teslas were death traps but Jesus Christ
Yeah it's sad. As the article points out similar incidents have happened repeatedly. Anyone who saw the door design could have (and did!) predict something like this would happen. My coworker was trapped in his Tesla in his garage for 15 minutes (and he wasn't in a panic).
Look at the picture of the manual door release here: It's pretty well hidden, you reach in and pull up on the door buttons.
... then scroll down and look at the picture of the rear door manual release. You have to pull off some trim from inside the pocket, pull off another panel, and then pull a cable.
... but wait! There's more!
Note: Not all Model Y vehicles are equipped with a manual release for the rear doors.
Jesus, I hope the engineers who signed off on this think about what they've done and do better. I would say I hope someone regulated bad emergency door releases out of existence but... y'know.
Imagine what other flaws these cars have if the tried to 'innovate' like this on the solved technology that is fucking doors.
The lack of a speedometer in front of your face is a pretty glaring quality issue. You have to turn your head to look at the massive touchscreen. The one that replaces all other dashboards and most tactile controls ~~for manufacturing cost savings~~ to be a cool futuristic vehicle of the future.
I won't even start talking about the whole CyberStuck thing again because that's too easy; except to point out that it has turn buttons on the steering wheel instead of a turn signal stalk, and a shifter on the ceiling.
I only recently bought my first car and it's just old enough that it didn't even have a backup camera until I got one installed. Honestly half the reason of buying used was so I could have a car without a touchscreen haha.
a shifter on the ceiling
I still can’t get over the design, engineering, and basic reasoning failures that must have gone into the decision to put supposedly the main way to change gears on the same type of mount that secures your rear-view mirror; a notably inconvenient and fragile place to put anything (and just like a rear-view mirror that got fucked with too intensely, a bunch of these shifters have already detached)
ofc it comes with a square wheel.
The austin allegro was far ahead of its time.
wikipedia picture of austin allegro steering wheel. It is square with deeply rounded corners.
absolutely delightful
Elon Musk, Ramaswamy land Trump admin roles
President-elect Trump has tapped tech entrepreneurs Elon Musk and Vivek Ramaswamy to lead an advisory group focused on cutting federal spending and reducing the size of the government.
Trump announced Tuesday that Musk and Ramaswamy would lead his “Department of Government Efficiency” (DOGE), an initiative meant to “slash excess regulations, cut wasteful expenditures” and restructure federal agencies.
We live in the dumbest timeline
I wasn't expecting complete fascist victory to be so... cringe
skibidi purges
guantanamo rizz
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hot sneer from lizzy w:
I voted for Liz in 2020 :( instead they gave me diamond joe
This is literally going to be an embezzlement op isn't it
Its gonna be the largest embezzlement scheme in US history, that much I'm certain. How much damage the pair will do to the federal gov I'm not sure, but I expect there won't be much left of it once they're done.
@BlueMonday1984 It's going to be like Alves dos Reis all over again, isn't it? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alves_dos_Reis
Personally I'm betting on Teapot Dome: somebody in the Cabinet will be convicted of something like bribery, foreign influence, or electoral interference; and the cleanup will implicate multiple other Cabinet members. Trump needs to do this at some point anyway; he's already done all of the Nixon things like Watergate and interfering in foreign wars, and while he attempted a Teapot Dome last time with Ryan Zinke, he needs to actually have a Cabinet member removed or convicted in order to truly be a worse president than Warren G. Harding.
How would that even happen with a Trumpist DOJ?
Trump would have to literally kill all lawyers. Think of the DoJ as a pile of folks who all took an oath to the law itself. When pundits complain that it's being "weaponized", they're actually talking about a facet of overcriminalization where the DoJ's limited attention can be controlled somewhat; it's always going to be a full-power laser that targets what the law perceives as criminality.
In particular, the President doesn't have the authority to tell the DoJ to stop an investigation, and the DoJ usually can't tell individual prosecutors to stop filing motions. Trump wasn't able to protect Cabinet member and Teapot Dome Candidate #2 Michael Flynn from prosecution, nor can he protect Eric Adams. The worst that he can do is a Saturday Night Massacre, where he fires lawyers until the investigations stop, and the entire pattern of special counsel is purpose-designed to prevent that from actually working.
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Because project 2025 and the mass deportations won't actually solve the problems his base is feeling, and at a certain point this kind of scandal will either be his downfall or his only option to scapegoat someone else.
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Just a general comment on the state of things. Now that Musk has fused with the ideological flesh chimera of the next US government and is tapping others to be absorbed, any US politics will be TechTakes-adjacent. Perhaps some ground rules must be set so we aren't drowned in non-procedurally generated slop.
Either way, I'm cutting back on the musk unless it is directly sneerable.
I know we're trying to cut back on the US politics for the sake of everyone's sanity, but Musk getting sneered by his own confabulator is still pretty good.
this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2024
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