Pete's Pyramids! Now with 5,000 year guarantee!

If you want to be remembered forever, a Pete's Pyramid is the only way to guarantee you and your slaves will be entombed forever. Our Ra-proof quadruple slope technology is perfectly aligned with astrological precision to make sure all your worldly belongings make it to the next realm. Ask about our embalming subscription package to keep your organs in the best shape possible.

Mike's mausoleums don't have this kind of deal.