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I would encourage you to continue to pursue your interests in programming despite AI advancements. Sticking with something you're interested in means you can stay motivated even when dealing with less pleasant other aspects of your job that always exist like annoying co-workers. Having the core work you enjoy has been critical in my career as I could get absorbed into it and block out other negatives. It also is a job where its quite acceptable to work remotely and based on your health conditions it seems like a good match.
I totally understand the anxiety around the future, and a degree is a huge financial investment. One way that might help is to think about learning in terms of adding tools to your belt, and less about training for job A and then getting job A. Programming has a lot transferable skills across many industries so you can follow the money into whatever industry is in demand by the time you finish your studies (it will probably be ai related IMHO). Whereas city planning is highly specialised and those skills are harder to transfer to the point you're locking yourself into an industry with a heavily limited revenue stream.
AI has changed how we work significantly but we will always need humans in the loop who actually know what's going on. This comes from someone with 26 years in the industry. There is so much more to building software than just coding too. Don't let the doomers get to you.
My other advice is while support networks can be helpful don't put your survival onto anyone else's shoulders. In my personal experience people are human at the end of the day they can let you down, and at the worst possible time. It's so so so much better to build self reliance and resilience. I think your assessment is true, people are hyper individualistic today, that said people do care still (look at all the replies in this thread trying to help), but there are limits to altruism. So for the question, where to invest to get stability, honestly my answer isn't community or your career, it's you invest in yourself and your own capabilities for the best chance of a successful future.
Good luck!