this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2026
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[–] DmMacniel@feddit.org 70 points 3 days ago (5 children)

take the glass, drink the water, pull out the Mandarin, no drop was spilled.

[–] spankysalmon@fedinsfw.app 31 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Would you want to drink water ten+ kids put their hands in?

[–] irish_link@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago

In the voice of Rocky and Bullwinkle announcer

Joins for

Immune system boost!!

Or

Sicknes of 100 hands!

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

There are clubs in Los Angeles where children's dirty bathwater cocktails sell for $50.00 a glass.

[–] Zahille7@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 2 points 3 days ago

A connoisseur, it seems, has entered the chat...

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 4 points 3 days ago (2 children)

If you think that's dirty just wait till you have kids

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Well, exactly the problem. It's not just any hands, but child hands.
When I dig through my memory, my hands could've often been classified as biohazard. Genuinely.

We had a separate toilet room with no sink. I've used to spend a lot of time closed there. I've also played with wet toilet paper, modeling it into shapes.
Remember, no sink. So, how did I get it wet? Yeah, just like that. And I didn't necessarily flush before.
Sometimes I even used turds wrapped in a layer of toilet paper. It was warm and squishy.

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

How long ago are we talking 👀 toilet fister

[–] reptar@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

Toilet Fister lol. Did Voyager do tags? Oh, yes it does. Sweet

[–] spankysalmon@fedinsfw.app 3 points 3 days ago

Grosser things existing doesn't make this magically OK.

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] thenextguy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

Give me the kniiiiiiiiiife

Pleeeeaaaaaaaase

[–] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (6 children)

the water is laced with rat poison...

[–] DmMacniel@feddit.org 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

But you're not the one having to drink the water

[–] DmMacniel@feddit.org 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Well i guess this would then surely fail under lab (rats) conditions. :(

[–] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 1 points 3 days ago

you are mocking this cruel torture these children are going through. god will have no mercy when you stand before his heavenly gates

[–] whyNotSquirrel@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The glass comes with a free frogurt.

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

Schrodinger's mandarin?

[–] FanciestPants@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Or maybe just as bad, it's had like 12 school kids' hands dunked in it before you get a chance at this strategy.

Imagine the gotcha on that one!

Too much mustache, I'd lose at least a drop or two

That's just spilling it into your mouth.