this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2026
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Mental Health

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I'm in my early 30s, so not necessarily "mid-life", but I think what I have been experiencing can be described this way. I went through a lot this past year, and it has both left some large scars as well as healed some other aspects and caused new ways of thinking in others. I've tried new things and enjoyed the things that I've tried.

But I feel like I need something "more", but I have no idea what that is. I keep getting caught on the horrifying realization of life being fleeting and I want to do something to make it more whole. But I can't outrun death so I don't know that anything is left to be done. But I feel like I need something to fill that space. I may in fact be chasing something that doesn't exist idk.

I guess I just feel a bit lost and would appreciate some direction.

More about me that may or may not influence your advice: I've always been a loner and the sort of "terminally online" type. I don't experience sexual attraction, so it sort of puts most options of relationships out the window. Asexual "dating" is not as prevalent or simple as you'd think. My career is very solid and I'm paid very well, so I'm not interested in switching careers. My career was a huge source of my trauma this past year, but I have made a lot of progress since and it's really not something I can easily change. I have discovered new and healthier forms of self-expression and have done new things. I own where I live and would not be able to sell it for as much as I paid for it either, which is another reason I'd be against moving. I am physically close-ish to family and visit every couple of weeks.

Thanks all for listening.

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[–] Seppo@sopuli.xyz -1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I was gonna say meet a nice girl and become a parent, as it's both fun and incredibly rewarding. Then you clarified that you are yourself still a child, at least mentally, so that advice goes out the window.

Have you considered drugs?

[–] dingus@lemmy.world -1 points 1 day ago

Why in the world are you calling me a child? Do you not see that as rude?

I am not sexually compatible with other people and hormonal testing I had done at the doctor's office indicates that I am unfortunately close to early menopause. Those things would make it very difficult for me to have that sort of a relationship and children out of it.