dingus

Hi! I adopted an FIV+ cat this past August. From reading online, I didn't think they would get sick too much more often than FIV- cats. I decided to adopt knowing that some might be turned off by his FIV status and knowing that I am lucky to be able to afford vet bills.

BUT this is the third upper respiratory tract infection he has had in 5 months. Each time, it doesn't seem to clear it on his own without antibiotics. I'm concerned he'll end up with antibiotic resistance over time if I keep doing this.

The first illness, he was given both oral antibiotics and eye drops for 2 weeks. The second time (several months later) his eyes weren't as bad and they gave me a supply of oral antibiotics only for 1 week (wish it could have been 2...didn't realize they only gave me enough for one). It's been a couple of months and he's sick again. I'm gonna take him in a few days if this doesn't start to clear again.

Some notes:

-He is an indoor only cat. I do not have other pets.

-He was swabbed for herpes one of the times and it was negative. One of the times he had a mycoplasma infection and the other time he was not swabbed.

-He was tested as FeLV- at the shelter. But I suppose if he had a very early infection, it might not have shown up.

-He mostly acts pretty normal during his infections thankfully (eating, using the bathroom, etc)...just maybe sometimes a tad less active.

-I'm going to start giving him lysine powder daily in his food (twice a day). The vet had me give it to him for the duration of the first infection, but I may as well just continue it forever since it seems fairly benign.

Thanks, guys!

Usually I keep this band flipped the other way so it's a private message for just me.

Quite frankly I'm just at a loss at this point. Been on the therapy and meds journey for almost a year now, and did the whole exercise shebang consistently for like 2 years. I was doing cardio for an hour every 1-2 days.

I am getting quite disillusioned and don't understand what I'm even doing anymore. I'm getting so caught up in various things that I'm just confused as all hell. Every time I think I figure something out, I end up so wrong it's almost like it's not even funny.

I have intense reactions to rejection. I have extreme and intense negative emotions that persist for many hours and days after a trigger and they are very painful and difficult to deal with and can impair functioning. I have a lot of social anxiety, which I did not think contributed much to this. But now I'm wondering if I have a pattern of social anxiety --> extreme rejection sensitivity --> extreme emotional dysregulation.

I have been on escitalopram (Lexapro), then lamotrigine (Lamictal), and now quetiapine (Seroquel). I do not have ADHD. I do not have bipolar disorder. I don't even have persistent depression. I have periodic extreme episodes that cause a lot of distress and can cause functional impairment like how my work threatened to fire me. I also have intense shame and self-hatred, often babbling to my online friends nonsense about how I'm a "demon" when I get this way. I am also totally normal 90% of the time. It's only the remaining 10% that causes the struggle.

People always tell me to "go to therapy". I am. I have seen multiple therapists and have been consistent with this one since the fall. People tell me I don't put enough work. I am. People tell me I am not honest enough to my providers. I am. People tell me try a different therapist. I have tried many (I stick with my main one for continuity and so that I don't have to keep rehashing my backstory).

At this point I feel like I don't know what is down and what is up. I no longer understand what my problem is anymore. Every time I think I figure out what my issue is, every time I think I figure out a technique to help me, I'm wrong.

I'm starting to think that this is who I am. It is unchangeable. I experience a lot of pain and sensitivity where others don't. I wish that wasn't the case, but I think it can't be changed.

Idk where do I go from here, friends? Thank you to those who have read my entire rant lmao.

I have been going through very intense workplace stress this year. Fuck up workplace relationships, threatened to fire me for having mental breakdown at work, yadda yadda yadda.

I have been in therapy, practicing DBT skills most days on the bus ride to work (other than TIPP bc idk how to do that on the bus), and taking medications.

I had a really bad spiral the past few days. I ended up inconsolable when I got home the other night (I live alone so no one heard me). I started trying to text/communicate with a billion different people, some of which we're my coworkers. I started texting them something akin to saying they will have a great time in the future and I appreciate them and goodbyes and whatnot. I said it because I was contemplating/really really just wanted to no call no show never come back into work (I work a professional job, not at like a Wendy's where it's expected).

I knew in the back of my mind that they could also view this as me saying goodbye before killing myself. I never ever said that outright but they panicked when I spoke vaguely and discussed with each other whether or not to Baker act me the next morning.

I have done this another time around the summer of last year. I feel embarrassed. I feel terrible. I feel like such a shitty person. But I was just in so much pain that I didn't know what to do. I was sobbing nonstop for hours and hours when I decided to do that.

I know I am supposed to use my skills. It is hard to do when I am on that level. It's hard for me to practice TIPP because it requires setup and is unpleasant and not accessible everywhere.

Am I a bad person? What do I do? They distance themselves from me because I am like this. And I knew it my heart it could be construed that way even though I was one of the most distressed I have gotten.

But I just don't know what to do with the pain. The DBT skills can help temporarily with intense concentration from me, but the moment my attention wavers from the distraction/distress techniques, the pain comes back. It's exhausting to focus that hard and I can't do it 24/7.

I am just so tired. It almost feels like physical pain all the time. And I always just feel so alone.

Thanks, guys.

You can do it, guys. Another day is here and another day to try to make it through. All you have to do is make it through one day. Don't think about tomorrow or the next day or the next. Today is now.

Sometimes it gets exhausting to try and try again every day. That's ok. When those times happen, you can rest and hibernate a bit until you're ready to come back.

Several months ago I got a tattoo in a easily visible place for me. Some mornings on my way to work, I look at it and it reminds me to keep fighting.

I'm tired. But I'll try again today.

Good luck to you all. You are all in my thoughts. And the weekend is just around the corner. :)

I always call mine "bro" or "my son". Rarely do I ever actually say his name lol.

I have tried therapy on and off for a while now. People would always get frustrated with me and tell me to "get therapy," but I never knew what I was actually supposed to be there for. And I tried a service like BetterHelp before (can't remember what this one was called), but it just sucked ass and I'm not sure if the people on there were even licensed professionals.

I finally started going consistently with this one therapist, but I frequently get frustrated with her for not giving me actual coping skills or techniques. One of her favorite things to ask me is "how can you deal with X?" And I get frustrated and say "I don't know." Because if I fucking knew I wouldn't be in therapy. She seems to do a more meandering talk therapy style thing with vague ideas of DBT and CBT thrown in there. She's not giving me enough skills to not get fired at work. She helped me go through a difficult time, but now that that's over, I'm back to square one.

So I found a therapist who specifically states she does DBT. Over time I have learned that my core issue is emotional dysregulation which is treated by DBT. She told me she follows this one workbook. I got the book. It's great! It gives you a zillion and one coping skills. But after having several sessions with her, I notice that she spends the entire time just going "in chapter 4, this happens. Then in chapter 8, this happens" while my eyes just glaze over. Today the session ended 35 minutes early because she only vaguely contributed to me talking about a problem I had today.

I have been seeing both therapists concurrently until my deductible resets in January.

I just am so endlessly frustrated with the entire mental health industry. I've seen so many different therapists. I've really tried to do any exercises that they have given me. I've tried multiple different psych meds (trying a new one now actually!).

Nothing works. Nothing has changed about me. I'm the same person with the same problems. And nothing I seem to try makes a lick of difference. I try so hard. I try a zillion different things...exercise, getting good sleep, eating right, therapy, meds...nothing changes me. Nothing helps me.

What in the everliving fuck am I missing? Do I have to go through 30 different therapists before I can find one that can help me? Am I just doing therapy "wrong"??? What am I supposed to be doing here?

Through all this, I've found that telling someone to "go to therapy" is almost offensive...it just absolves others from caring about you and makes it sound like you're not willing to do the base effort in bettering yourself.

Sorry for the long post and thanks for taking the time to read.

Hello. I have a very affectionate 5 year old cat that I got this August. He warmed up right away and wanted to sleep with me in my bed the first night. So I have let him ever since.

Recently he has gotten in the habit of clawing me to wake me up (or just generally for attention). I have tried both making a loud noise when he does this or ignoring him, but it doesn't seem to work. Plus ignoring it is difficult when it hurts you lol.

So last night he was sleeping in bed with me as usual. He started clawing me at like 5 am and wouldn't stop. So I tricked him to get him out of the room. I got out of bed and went into the hall where he obviously followed me. But then I walked back into my room and shit the door behind me.

He has been crying at the door all night which makes me feel bad but still. Is this a viable way to correct this behavior? My plan was to maybe do this each morning that he does this.

Hi all. Been taking lamotrigine off label from my psych provider. Intended to help with emotional instability.

I have been slowly titrating up. Had some ups and downs but now I feel like I'm nearly at the worst I've ever been.

I have been on 200 for the past 3 weeks. My mood has not stabilized in that time and I am getting much worse.

A few days after the increase to 200 my coworker noticed an immediate and dramatic negative shift in mood and appearance. Prior to that, I was on 150 for 5 weeks. Initially I was doing pretty good but I had a steady decline for the entirety of the 5th week before I was upped to 200.

My bros please help. This is destroying my career and relationships. It has immediate and significant impacts on my life.

I sent my provider an urgent message in her portal but yeah I need to figure out this shit asap.

Not sure if I am having a paradoxical reaction to every psych med I am trying or what??? Also yes I am in therapy but in the process of changing to one who is a lot more strucutred in her approach and less of a talk therapist.

I've been through idk how many therapists. And therapy is expensive as fuck because my insurance is shit. So I'm fucking done with this bullshit.

Most therapists I've tried, even if they claim to have certain treatment modalities, seem to just be keen on sitting there and listening to me talk without giving me much guidance at all. They give me vague ideas and not actually real skills or homework. This isn't helping me at all whatsoever.

Part of the issue is that I literally could never pinpoint what the fuck my issue was. I did see a therapist years back who seemed to actually give skills and worksheets, but she was using CBT for a minor issue for me because I couldn't figure out what my problem actually was. I only had a few sessions and then stopped due to the price and the fact that I thought she latched onto a minor problem to treat (and I didn't know my issue then).

When someone told me about "emotional dysregulation" and I found out that DBT is the gold standard for it, I have tried to find some who practice this, but it seems that most don't. And those who claim to are actually often essentially talk therapists who just listen to me instead of giving me techniques and homework to build skills.

I'm frustrated as all fucking hell. Recently my work told me I will be fired if I cannot sort myself out. I am desperate here.

I live in the US, Florida specifically.

Thanks for listening.

Hi. I've had my cat since August. He sleeps in my bed every night and has done so since I've got him. I've always had an incredibly mild allergy to cats...mostly when they scratch me I sometimes get very itchy (but not always), or if there are a metric buttload of them in the room (as in a shelter), my throat and eyes will be a bit scratchy. Otherwise I'm fine.

In the past several weeks, I have been sneezing a fuckton and when go to bed and wake up in the morning my nose is entirely stuffed up and runny. It goes away once I'm up and moving, but I'm still periodically sneezing whenever I'm at home. The litter boxes are NOT in my bedroom.

Any tips??? I don't want to kick him out of the bed. :(((

I have always thought that I have felt emotions much more strongly than others. At baseline, I don't feel a whole lot of positive or negative, but a stimulus easily puts me into overdrive, like the volume knob on the stereo suddenly gets maxed out and the gas pedal gets stuck down.

I bet a lot of you can relate to this. Everyone has things that make them different than others. This is one of mine. Sometimes, it can make it different to function in life. But it also has good things...the highs feel really high and I think it makes me very empathetic and much more inclined to be kind. Things are pathologized when we don't fit nearly I do the functional box that society wants us to. Nothing has ever changed this quality about me...not therapy or medications. It is who I am and it bothers a lot of people and even myself.

But I think our brains are just wired differently than some. And that's ok. It what makes you authentically you. It's what makes you empathetic.

I will give you a quote by Pearl S. Buck that I really resonated with...

A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive.

To him... a touch is a blow,

A sound is a noise,

A misfortune is a tragedy,

A joy is an ecstasy,

A friend is a lover,

A lover is a god,

And failure is death.

The first line that I omitted is about creativity but I don't think this necessarily correlates with that. For me it doesn't, anyway.