this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2026
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[–] Mantzy81@aussie.zone 119 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Americans will use anything other than the metric system.

[–] BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 34 points 2 months ago (5 children)

As an american, I am 100% onboard on switching entirely to measuring things in terms of pickup trucks.

[–] Corngood@lemmy.ml 42 points 2 months ago (5 children)
  1. Preheat oven to 1 pickup truck
  2. Bake for 1 pickup truck
[–] DomeGuy@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Since most automobiles are water-cooled, the pickup truck temp is probably about 110 f / 43 c, so you'd want to preheat to 3 1/2 pickup trucks.

Similarly, since the mean life of trucks is probably 20 years, we'd measure casual time in a subdivisions of 175,320 hours / 10,519,200 minutes. One picotruck would be 1/10th of a minute, so you want to bake for 300 pico-trucks

We will of course maintain this system once trucks become 50-year lived semi-autonomous drones that never get over 35 c, because the one constant in defining units is that rejiggijng definitions is preferred to technical precison.

[–] ZoteTheMighty@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago

Your oven will preheat in about 5 minutes, which means it's heading at 3pickup trucks per 50 picotrucks, or, once you reduce the units, 60 billion.

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 13 points 2 months ago

F-350°F for F-150 minutes.

I think this could be an untapped cookbook market. Make it look like a shop manual and I’m in.

[–] MagnificentSteiner@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 months ago

This is what it's like for Europeans to follow American recipes!

1 cup of any liquid... no problem, that's 240ml.

1 cup of raisins... who fucking knows.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

This pickup truck can accelerate to thirty thousand pickup trucks per hour, and fuel efficiency is one quarter quarter quarter toy pickup truck per pickup truck.

[–] scutiger@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Things got confusing when my electric meter started reporting pickup truck pickup truck pickup trucks.

[–] k0e3@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This recipe serves 2-3 pickup trucks

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 months ago

The test results are back, you are HIV pickup truck.

[–] gnate@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But the reference objects keep getting bigger!

[–] BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 months ago

It's like a cubit, it changes depending on who's in charge.

[–] kbobabob@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Are we talking OG Ford ranger or new Ford ranger?

[–] ramjambamalam@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 months ago

A 2026 Ford Satellite

[–] tal@lemmy.today 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

This is a Canadian publication.

EDIT:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Narwhal

The Narwhal is a Canadian investigative online magazine that focuses on environmental issues.[1][2]

[–] cecilkorik@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Unfortunately, a lot of Americanisms have infected Canada due to our historically extremely close trade and cultural relationship with them. Measurement ignorance is one example. Some Americanisms actually become arguably worse in Canada, because we are effectively rudderless, pulled in all different directions by both our own laws and customs and American laws and customs at the same time, resulting in an even less well-defined choice of units. Another example is dates. The US uses mm/dd/yy which is already stupid on its own, but Canada uses BOTH mm/dd/yy and dd/mm/yy seemingly without rhyme or reason, which results in complete ambiguity of many dates, or trying to figure out based on context, looking for other dates that might use a day number >12 to identify which one actually is the day vs the month.

It's awful. I am happy we are distancing ourselves from the US right now, but I'm not sure it will ever be enough to totally escape their shadow.

[–] avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

The US uses mm/dd/yy which is already stupid on its own, but Canada uses BOTH mm/dd/yy and dd/mm/yy seemingly without rhyme or reason

Maintains our cognitive health. Can't just look at a date and know what it is without doing math and logic (method of exclusion)!

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

and when it's 2/3 which is it?

[–] avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Then you get to exercise probability theory. 😆

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] WoodScientist@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Fuck it. Let's just outlaw time. Let's just make it illegal to own a clock!

Calendars too. We'll just live in the eternal now.

[–] ramjambamalam@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

ISO-8601 master race

(e.g. 2026-04-24 for the uninitiated)

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

yeah, we have fucking idiots who have no idea what a kilogram is.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Maybe if we tricked them into saying, like, "as heavy as a three hundred kilogram box of bricks"

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

but that's not as much fun as saying as tall as a three hundred kilogram box of bricks.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

okay point for canadians being american in that american covers the continents sometimes, not just stupid ol' statesia

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

is that an old fashioned pickup truck or an electric pickup truck

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago

Metric pickup trucke

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Infinite@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I'm a little upset it took someone took this long to include California, nice