Not The Onion

20728 readers

1018 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

kescusay@lemmy.world

301

Workers who love ‘synergizing paradigms’ might be bad at their jobs (news.cornell.edu)

submitted 18 hours ago by sundray@lemmus.org to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

61 comments fedilink hide all child comments

YA THINK?

“Corporate bullshit is a specific style of communication that uses confusing, abstract buzzwords in a functionally misleading way,” said Littrell, a postdoctoral researcher in the College of Arts and Sciences. “Unlike technical jargon, which can sometimes make office communication a little easier, corporate bullshit confuses rather than clarifies. It may sound impressive, but it is semantically empty.”

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] RobotToaster@mander.xyz 18 points 17 hours ago (3 children)

To analyse the impact of this study I recommend that we set up an interdepartmental committee with fairly broad terms of reference so that at the end of the day we'll be in the position to think through the various implications and arrive at a decision based on long-term considerations rather than rush prematurely into precipitate and possibly ill-conceived action which might well have unforeseen repercussions.

[–] Bane_Killgrind@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

Your connection from premise to results is too tangible, vague it up a bit

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 12 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

We need to empower a multidisciplinary workgroup to establish a performative analysis of our process capabilities from a data driven perspective relative to this newly published benchmark.

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

As a member of the insulative layer of management between the floor and the corporate asshats I have to speak the language.

This translates to "Get the most no nonsense worker from every department up here, lets compare what they think we can do in a perfect world vs reality and have a look at what we can do to make the numbers look like what our bosses bosses boss wants to see, without cutting anyones hours or working any harder."

[–] Bane_Killgrind@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 16 hours ago

This is what I'm talking about

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 3 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

If you need anyone to operationalize our assets for a best-in-brand technology assessment, feel free to drop me a bilateral session to set up preliminaries!

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 hours ago

Translation: to make this work best, we need a meeting to plan it.

[–] chaogomu@lemmy.world 0 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Too cautious, management wants movement on this, not deliberation. Setup a tiger team and give me an action plan asap.

[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 1 points 9 hours ago

Setup a tiger team

Meow!