this post was submitted on 27 Feb 2026
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I spent several years at home in social isolation before I got my first job. I photograph people for documents (and do a few other things), and it can be unbearable. Some people genuinely have no idea what they look like, they're often upset by their photos, and sometimes it turns into aggression towards me. One man was surprised by the asymmetrical shape of his chin and started shouting, "Do you really think I look like that?!" And what can I say to that? "You really do"? I just get nervous and try to find the words while he continues to talk rudely to me, as if I'd deliberately set the camera to distort his chin.

Then a woman brings her teenage daughter in for a passport photo, and they start arguing and yelling at each other about whether it's better for her to have her hair down or not, and the girl doesn't like any of the photos and can't even explain what's wrong, so we have to take several more, and they get increasingly irritated and start accusing me of that her cheeks too big and I should have told her to suck them in or position the camera somehow so her cheeks weren't visible, or some other nonsense, like I'm a fucking wizard. I have a hard time dealing with situations like that, I often start mumbling and shaking, but it only seems to irritate them more, and they speak to me even more rudely, and then they just throw money on my table in annoyance and leave, and I sit there and try to compose myself for another half hour. I've been brought to tears several times already. Some of them are insanely arrogant and rude people.
One woman sent me a link to some documents to print, but the link had expired, I showed it to her and asked for a new link, she said her son had sent the link and that it worked on her phone, I showed her again that the link wasn't working and that it had probably just expired, but she kept insisting that it worked on her phone. I told her I couldn't print anything for her, and she said, "what if I call your employer?" lmao. I had to take her fucking phone and call her son to send me a new fucking link. And there were a lot of similar moments. It's not uncommon for them to claim that I said something I didn't say or didn't do what they asked, and so on. I've cried so many times because of this job, and I think I'm starting to hate and fear people more and more, but I'm not sure I can find a better job where I live.

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[–] sturger@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

The problem is 100% crappy people. However, there are things you can do photographically to "help". If you're willing to spend the time to learn the "art" of photography, there are tricks to enhancing some aspects while playing down others.

For example, wide-angle lenses will distort faces in unappealing ways. For 35mm cameras, 70mm is the recommended lens for portraits for that reason. There are secrets to posing, lighting and dress that help make more flattering pictures.

Tailors have to (used to?) deal with similar problems with people. There are tricks to make a suit more flattering for a person, but there are no perfect solutions.

If you want to keep taking pictures professionally, you'll probably want to learn how to dress, pose and light people for the most flattering effect. You'll also want to take social training to learn how to use spoken and body language to help sway/calm/reassure people. You might also find an assistant who is really good socially do to the posing. That will let you stay behind the camera and focus on the technical aspects, if that is the part that appeals to you.