this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2025
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Basically title, I participated in an interesting exchange over the past day or so, and it made me wonder what some of the more useful resources are for men to learn about their bodies, hormones, brains, emotions, support networks, etc.

So I’m interested in websites, forums, video series, books, whatever. Links would be great if you’ve got them.

(Disclaimer: I am not male myself, which is why I’ve no idea, and am curious, but if this gains traction, I’d also just like to have this post be a resource. It’s good to periodically take stock of what’s out there.)

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[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 0 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

there are have been violent male incels and female incels.

but only one of those gets media play, due to cultural sex biases.

just like female pedophiles get a pass and male pedophiles are witch-hunted. nobody calls for the tortue and wrap of women pedophiles, weird right?

[–] Sunsofold@lemmings.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

There is a difference of scale and type. The male incel community tends to produce outwardly focused violence, which sometimes hits at a larger scale, sometimes seemingly completely indiscriminately, or tying into other ideologies of hate. Femcel communities tend to produce smaller, more focused violence. They don't produce mass shootings/stabbings in anywhere near the same amounts.

As for the pedophile double-standard, I suspect that has to do with a visibility bias rooted in most of the people espousing those views being violent adult men with traditional understandings of gender.

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 1 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

there are also just way more male incels than female incels by the nature of sex and biology. if you have 50K male incels and 5K female incels, and only .01% are violent, then you will have 50 male incidents and 5 female ones. but statisically that does not mean male incels are 10x more violent, it's just numbers. incels probably are less violent than non incels, on average, as much of their inceldom comes from their passivity and fear.

last i checked there was never an epidemic of incels. it's like a few random incidents, far suppressed by school shootings, which are basically weekly at this point in the USA. but it gets way more press time because of the controversial gender stuff that ragebaits people. at this point nobody cares if another 10 year old kills 6 of his classmates, that's boring and mundane, but if some 17 year old knife stabs 3 people with an incel rant, that's exciting and novel. mass violence needs a 'hate' element for the media to generate attention these days.