this post was submitted on 23 Nov 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 68 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 1 hour ago) (2 children)

if a woman used this line on me my response would be "wait here a few minutes i need to pop into the nearest jewelry store"

[–] QuazarOmega@lemy.lol 3 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

The dystopia calls for the payment failing due to...

[–] janus2@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 hour ago

i bought too many board games

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 40 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

*puts on ski mask*
ALRIGHT EVERYBODY HIT THE FLOOR THIS IS A ROBBERY

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 3 points 8 hours ago

I’m in a transitional period so I don’t wanna kill you, I wanna help you.

[–] Klear@quokk.au 21 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

ANY OF YOU FUCKING PRICKS MOVE I'M GONNA EXECUTE EVERY LAST FUCKING ONE OF YOU!

[–] IronBird@lemmy.world 12 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

milkshakes are like 10$'s now

[–] fleem@piefed.zeromedia.vip 6 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

i met a dog last week that showed me how to die

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 7 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

*comes back to woman with the French crown jewels, a milkshake, and a suspiciously living dog*

[–] nylo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 10 hours ago

*pumpiserlou starts playing*