this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2025
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Mildly Infuriating
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Home to all things "Mildly Infuriating" Not infuriating, not enraging. Mildly Infuriating. All posts should reflect that. Please post actually infuriating posts to !actually_infuriating@lemmy.world
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To correct your 'public park' analogy, the space is public. Anyone can wander in. But it has clear signs posted at the only entrance saying its a space for women to speak, please be quiet, otherwise.
Missing the sign and apologizing is understandable.
But but if you wander in and knowingly violate that rule by electing to speak up, that is no one's fault but yours.
...A primary reason for that rule is basically "don't be a dick about this being a women's only space, please."
If you feel you qualify as a woman to speak in the space, go for it! That's the idea. That's the spirit of the rule. But you specifically say "nor do [I] identify as being a ‘woman’. "
Making an issue out of it is precisely what is unwanted. So is trying to blame the space for your deliberate choice.
I don't get why this is so hard to grasp. It's simple.
just because i feel that way doesn't mean the people in charge feel that way.
it's just part of life. mods gotta mod. this entire post to me just seems like moral grandstanding/public shaming.
and further, i commented in that thread too. i came from the front page of lemmy.world. there were no rules posted. there was no signage. but i didn't get called out by the mods because i 'type like a girl' and often pass as a woman on the internet.
I'm not trying to grandstand. My issue is with these presumptions:
They're not checking you at the door. They aren't auto banning anyone. They very politely point out the sidebar to a few posters, then request them to stay quiet; that's the extent of it.
...If you don't make an issue of that, it's not an issue.
But this is unrealistic, as then they wouldn't get nearly as much participation in the space. It's a public gathering spot, by choice.
Again, my specific problem is with commenters that are shown the rules by the mods, yet willingly choose to ignore them.
Just because you think rules are unrealistic does not give you a right to ignore them once asked. That's how every community here works. Yet they seem to get tons of posters carrying that bad attitude, with that same line of argument.
That's what makes me bristle. Respecting community rules (once known) is basic human civility, and people are perfectly capable of 'self-policing' that. I do not like the rejection of that + the policing of others in its place.