this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 124 points 2 days ago (3 children)

He forgot to buy a second gun to stop his dog from using his first gun against him.

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 57 points 2 days ago

Where were all the good dog gun owners to defend the victim?

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 35 points 2 days ago (2 children)

The only thing that stops a good dog with a gun is a bad dog with a gun.

Or maybe a cat with a knife, I guess? I dunno.😸

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 6 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Cats already have little knives, though. Around 18 of them...

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I found a shiv made of a sharpened toothbrush in his litterbox. I think this is why he tries to follow me to the shower.

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 2 points 1 day ago

No, they're just curious. They don't understand why you go into the rain partition, but hope you are okay in there!

[–] stephen01king@piefed.zip 2 points 1 day ago

You're saying as if a cat with 19 knives wouldn't be even scarier.

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It is the cat. The problem is then you need a mouse with a rusty needle to deal with the cat.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 1 points 1 day ago

And then a parasite with a Tylenol to deal with the mouse, and so it ever was.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 days ago

But then you'd have to buy a third gun to protect you from the second one