chat

Tinder sort of just randomly sends you people after 3 days of being like "there is no one in your area". That's fine because in my area, it's nothing but tradwives, country music, and fishing profiles.

I tried Veggly because a super bonus point is finding someone to chill with that is also vegan. Well, there's like 4 people in my area on there. Sort of figured but lol anyway. There are a few more if you check like 500 miles away but not quite looking for the nomadic life just yet.

Tried Feeld, and no. Just no. I'm open to various relationship dynamics but that ain't it.

Tried Hinge, it was mostly dead until I changed my gender back to male and put that I'm only looking for women. Feels a bit disingenuous but whatever. But again in my area, I keep getting Christian tradwives and shit.

And if you find someone that seems nice on these dumb apps, they have to like you back before they can communicate with you. But... but... you can spend $149.99 to see who liked you. Not predatory at all. Just me heading back to the dating slop machine to toss more money at it to see who likes my ugly ass.

But like I've seen a few that I genuinely liked but will never be able to contact since it's all behind a paywall.

Saturday evening I matched on Tinder with 3 people. First one, said hey and they unmatched, second one I waited for them to say hey, then replied and they unmatched. 3rd one flatout ghosted me.

I got a "like" notification from a random old dude yesterday on Tinder but my profile isn't even set for interested in men.

I redid my entire Hinge and Tinder profile like 3 times each.

On Bumble I got a like notification and actually spent $25 to see who it was. She was cute, seemed nice. So we talked a bit, she gave me her number and we talked on the phone some. We talked a bit about our own messed up lives. She had breast cancer, which isn't a dealbreaker, she's ND as fuck, but so am I. We went on a date. It was awkward. First her pics on Bumble were from like 15 years ago. The whole date was awkward, but towards the end we decided to go for a walk and the conversation was just about exes. Which is never a good sign. Then my ex actually fucking called me because the kids wanted to show me their Legos. That caused me to spiral all over again. So still processing the divorce. Went home and got trashed and realized that I'm not gonna be a good fit for this person that I went on the date with. She needs someone that can take care of her. I can't even take care of myself.

I'm probably done with even trying to find someone that fits me. I'm too old to start over. This city sucks for trying to find anyone remotely close to my personality.

This shit is just fucking depressing.

Thanks for coming to my rouxTALK.

Edit: I'm buried in the comments but at work rn. I'll try to get to the rest tonight. I honestly didn't think this would gain much conversation since it was met to be me screaming in the void. ❤️🖤