this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2023
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They’re all really bad and soul crushing. I’m not even talking from a perspective of someone that’s not had success, most of these apps push you into maximizing how many potential dates you can get and it’s not healthy. You’re find a lot more happiness developing hobbies and connecting naturally through them rather than juggling dates or the other awful shit women have to go through of trying to determine if the person is just using you for a quick lay
Yeah I totally feel this. I really need to just....find social shit to do. All my hobbies are solitary and I keep to myself in public.
It can be hard if you don’t live in an urban center but even things like reading groups are a very simple way to meet people. Last time I did a book group I was surrounded by middle aged women that were just entirely enamored with a guy there that reads, the bar is very low honestly. With any hobby that involves interacting with others over a long period of time you will have a huge benefit from just not being a crummy person. With women especially there is a huge benefit from just being around enough to show that you aren’t a prick
This is 100% me. I really feel that the West has a bias against introverts, especially introverted men. Like, there's nothing inheritly wrong with enjoying one's own company more, but FFS our culture punishes it.
it's cool how we have to decide between the mental self-harm of apps and the risk of physical harm catching covid to have a chance at evaluating the risk of intimate partner violence.