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Mocktail perfect for man who doesn't want to drink, but still wants to spend $18 (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 4 days ago by MHLoppy@fedia.io to c/theonion@sh.itjust.works

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Local restaurant the Green Garden began serving mocktails which are perfect for the person who doesn’t want to drink, but still wants to spend $18, confirmed sources.

“I was feeling left out drinking an affordable diet Coke,” explained sober man Lawrence Wilkes. “All my friends were having a great time spending $22 at a time on espresso martinis and mezcal old fashioned drinks. I always felt excluded when it was time to close out our tabs and I’d only spent like $16 on food and they’d spent half their paychecks in one sitting. Thankfully there’s a way to feel like I partied hard too. Like, when we went to the Green Garden, I noticed they had a menu of mocktails. I think that is a portmanteau of mock and cocktail, but I would have to Google it to make sure. It was delicious, and it cost me as much as a burger without fries would have, so I felt good about it. I’ve just had way too much money on my hand ever since I quit boozing.” [...]

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[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 54 points 4 days ago (5 children)

This is a very real social aspect that can make it hard to quit for some people. I legitimately felt left out at a lot of things when I quit drinking because everyone was getting wild drinks and people would get excited for each other's choices, trying sips and whatnot. Then I'd be like yay I have water. Mocktails helped provide me with some of the social excitement while I was still easing out of drinking being a main part of socializing for me

Them costing as much as an actual cocktail though is absolutely criminal. They were so expensive in Seattle $18-22 isn't even satire

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 10 points 3 days ago

Same with zero alcohol beer. We finally get beers that don't taste like piss but they charge as much as taxed beers. But the reality is restaurants can't survive without $18 drinks.

[–] AbsolutelyClawless@piefed.social 13 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Throughout my life I've come to realize that being a non-smoker and non-drinker (alcohol or caffeine for that matter) really puts you in a difficult spot a lot of the time. I've missed on a lot of crucial socializing because of it. People around here tend to meet and bond over these things. Plus, being the only sober person at a gathering... sucks, to put it lightly. My partner recently had to take that role at their work gathering, and after returning home, they just told me "now I know how you feel", lol.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's normal, but rather pathetic that people can't socialize without getting intoxicated.

[–] AbsolutelyClawless@piefed.social 3 points 3 days ago

Honestly, I'd be happy to find people who just want to play board games and party games (i.e. Mafia) sober, but with my circumstances it's rather difficult. Instead, I vicariously experience it by watching other people do it on the internet, heh...

[–] timbuck2themoon@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago

Article I read said that making mocktails is harder simply because you can't replicate the taste and balance. Like just adding more simple syrup and such won't work well. So they make specialty additions that replicate the alcohol but they actually cost more than the alcohol itself, thus the higher price.

[–] Flames5123@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 days ago

I live in the brewery district of Seattle, and I’ve stopped drinking during most weekdays. But I still need the third place after work on some days. Wheelie pop at least does Italian sodas at $2, but every other brewery with NA beers are just as expensive!

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 days ago

Sometimes at work functions we go to a bar, and it would be awkward for those of us who don't drink if we also didn't nurse mocktails. I usually go with a lemonade or something, but sometimes I go with a virgin daiquiri or something.