this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2025
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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 38 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

Maybe Satan isn't all that bad a guy and he was banished to a place for eternity that doesn't really bother him

and maybe this is why we are sent to hell ... we are Satan's punishment ... we are sent there to torture Satan for eternity

So Satan sets the place on fire and tries to burn all of us to try to kill us but we are undead and keep asking him why and send him texts of 'lol'

Turns out Satan is actually Doom Guy condemned to fight us for eternity

[–] Sonor@lemmy.world 38 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] El_Scapacabra@lemm.ee 5 points 5 days ago
[–] udon@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Why would some people be sent to heaven, though?

[–] SuperNinjaFury@lemm.ee 11 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

They weren't annoying enough to send to hell as punishment for Satan, and God thought they'd be cool to hang out with.

[–] udon@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

I think they're just toys in God's creep collection

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 2 points 4 days ago

Who said and who has proof that anyone was sent to heaven?

[–] CallateCoyote@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

The God of the Old Testament is an absolute monster, so I automatically like the guy who opposed him more.

I really like the Gnostic belief that this God is the “demiurge”… a lesser, malevolent, ignorant and false god who created the material world as a flawed imitation of the divine realm. He traps human souls in matter, while the true, transcendent God remains distant and unknowable. Some gnostics see the serpent as the good guy for encouraging Adam and Eve to eat the fruit of knowledge and free humanity from the ignorance of Yaldabaoth, the blind fool god, very much like Morpheus in The Matrix (which adapts all kinds of ideas from Gnosticism).