this post was submitted on 25 Nov 2024
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My parents sent me abroad (New Zealand) in January due to the situation in our country and honestly even after almost a year here I still feel homesick and lonely even though I’ve made some friends.

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[–] kava@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

i went through a breakup a few years back and spent like 2 years just alone at my house. didn't interact with any friends, didn't seek out any romantic interests. nothing, just coding video games and work basically.

after a while, i started getting interested in social contact again. so i started going to kava bars. every night after work i'd go hang out a couple of hours at a kava bar. started meeting people, having a social life. i got on tinder, met some girls. started dating one of them

moral of the story?

sometimes in life you have phases. it's OK to be alone for a while. but when you feel like you don't want to be alone anymore, go out to a place where there are people. i don't know how the kava scene is in new zealand.. i'd imagine you get pretty good stuff because you're smack dab in the middle of the pacific island region.

but to me kava bars are great because a) i don't like alcohol or people who are drunk and b) you get an interesting scene of "alternative" people who don't necessarily mash with the standard mainstream ideals of what youre "supposed to be" or "supposed to do"

so that worked for me but may not work for you. maybe you like chess. maybe you like card games. maybe you like drinking beer and playing pool. or bonsai.

whatever the hell you like, there's something out there so just go to social events regularly and the rest will solve itself