I came out to my mom in may and until 2.5 weeks ago everything was fine. I had another session with my therapist and before that I told her how my feelings regarding my gender identity intensified and that I seriously started considering DIY HRT (not in that words because she doesn't know what that means, but that was the point). After that she started to swing really hard in both directions when talking to me about my gender identity. She is doing her best to help me (it's not very successful because she doesn't understand what being trans means) but sometimes she tells me how people from LGBT community do really bad stuff. To be fair, in our country there were some situations where someone from from the community who would do something in public they really shouldn't do, but that's really small number of people. I told her that only some people are like that and most don't do things like that but she just tells me that it's actually opposite. Today she entered my room just to show me how some crossdressers "made fun" of the Last supper (she found it offensive because she is a Christian) and to tell me how bad it is and that that's what I want to get into. Worst part is that I already told her the first time that I don't want to participate in public LGBT events and that I just want to live my own life, but she continues to do stuff like this. To me it feels like she sees things like things and is scared that I will be part of that while ingoring what I already told her. And I don't like the way she talks about that. I'd like to give her some resources so she could learn something about trans people but I couldn't find anything good on my native language (she doesn't know any other language). If I just told her that wouldn't be enough. At this point I'm not sure is she truly accepting or not. What should I do?
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Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
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- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
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- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
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Good to know, thank you.
I think this only makes me feel more confident that a good path forward is to protect yourself as much as possible. Be careful about who knows about your transition, and prepare to take care of your needs if necessary.
If possible, making arrangements to leave and move to a safer place may be necessary, but that will also take a lot of time and can be difficult to do, so it might be better to focus on the short-term needs first.
It is hard to balance all the needs and to know what requires preparation and action and what doesn't. Lots of trans folks are in a position like you are, which is why I suggest connecting with local trans and gay communities.