leverage

For Korean BBQ, and other restaurants like this such as Hot Pot, you need to drop any conception you have about these being places you go to eat. These are places you go to socialize, the food is secondary. This is food that is optimized to be eaten slowly over 2+ hours, because you aren't there for the food, you're there to hang out with people.

We tend to have rigid concepts of things and get disregulated when expectations aren't met. You walked into a restaurant thinking they'd serve you food and you'd be done in a normal amount of time, of course you had a less than ideal time.

I had the exact same complaints about Korean BBQ and crawfish boils, but now that I've changed my expectations of them, they are a great time assuming you're with people you like. The food tastes much better in good company.

I've had this experience with a ton of things in life. Not being able to make sense of something sucks. When that something is an event / experience, the experience sucks, and if you aren't careful you will set in your mind that experience as the standard for such events. So much random nonsense exists strictly as an excuse to socialize, and when you don't enjoy socializing because you haven't managed to consistently do it with people you like (basically all NT people, 85%+ of the world), the random nonsense won't make sense. None of this is ever outright explained.

Me at 12, taken fishing on a lake. 6 hours later, what the fuck was the point of that. I could have been playing video games. We didn't even catch any fish! Me at 30, hell yeah, an excuse to drink some beers with friends and get away from the house for a weekend.

Hopefully you can give it another shot one day, maybe at a place that has more comfortable seats. There are certainly places where everyone gets enough grill space and food doesn't need to be shared so much.

My flavor of sleep disorder, I fall asleep when I'm bored. On modafinil I get through the boring activities like driving without falling asleep. Without the drug I've no issues staying awake for hours after regular sleep if I'm really hooked on something, like a good show, game, or project. At the end of the day once the drug starts wearing off, I'll fall asleep watching shows if they aren't engaging enough.

They say it promotes wakefulness, but I don't buy it. I think they've misidentified some key mechanism, at least in neurodivergent brains.

When I fall asleep, I hit REM within 15 minutes, compared to the 2 hours it takes NT brains. This was per an EEG taken during my sleep study, overnight and through forced naps the next day. I swear I'll be in REM while awake sometimes, if I'm fighting sleep, like I perceive the movement.

I've narcolepsy, modafinil (200mg daily) eliminates undesirable dozing for me. It doesn't prevent sleep altogether, just the kind of falling asleep while driving I was dealing with before.

It's weird to classify it as a stimulant, you can see them pussyfoot around it on Wikipedia. No one gets amphetamine like energy from this drug. Neurologists don't understand the mechanisms at play, only that it's effective at treating symptoms of narcolepsy. They've given it to pilots to have them fly for 48+ hours without sleep fatigue, but that's not the same as being wired. College kids abuse it to trade sleep for study time. Plenty of countries don't prescribe it for ADHD.

Why are you going to sleep at 10am? Why are you taking a drug that primarily treats narcolepsy, and then going to sleep? Outside of being sick, the only way I can pull that off is if I'm suffering deep depression, and use sleep as an escape from it all. I hope you're ok, that you have a fulfilling purpose.

At what point do we consider a carjacking over? The violence of the action was ongoing. If this was their house, the person is still invading.

I'm aware of the letter of the law, I'm arguing spirit. I'm also ok with the idea that a civil society with a working justice system should discourage people from such actions. We're not really living in that sort of system right now, especially if we're talking about poor areas and marginalized groups. Might be a good idea for us to debate this shit as the populations underserved by our justice system keeps growing, and evidence that the US justice system exists only to protect the rich keeps piling up.

Are they staying open because there's marketing value in being open on a holiday, or because there's business as usual money to be made. If it's not for some extra marketing purposes, this just lays bare how much more money they could be paying folks and still remain profitable.

Overtime and holiday pay was meant to disincentivize manufacturing companies from overworking their people and not letting them spend time doing frivolous things like being with family on holidays. The difference between the cost of labor and the value of labor was so small back then (after decades of negotiating, union action, and bloodshed) that a simple 1.5x was enough to disincentivize it under most circumstances. It's so vast now for the service industry that they are willing to pay 2.5 times as much.

I'm with you, last time an update was this rough for me was like 6+ years ago. That last rough experience had me avoiding major updates until at least 6 months after launch, the only reason I updated was some shitty policy change my corporate IT implemented that wouldn't stop popping up about it.

If you haven't already, force a full rebuild of your spotlight index, https://support.apple.com/en-us/102321 . The only other advice aside from rollback or reinstall is to create a new user profile.

Yep, it's a total shitshow with most research and popular science news. More results are coming together about various ND conditions being strictly genetic, yet there's still a ton of people out there talking about what could trigger issues after birth, and cures. You can no more make a zebra into a horse than you can make an ND person into an NT person.

Some of the things people consider issues are unproblematic and natural within ND populations, but NT people rule the world and since they deem it weird, we have to change. I'm at least hopeful that this ND awareness spring we seem to be in, where a lot of adults are becoming aware that they are (and always have been) healthy ND adults, will give rise to some improved acceptance and eventually help shift how we treat ND children to avoid the everyday traumas that I think lead to unhealthy ND adults. I'd be even more optimistic if it weren't for the constant denialism and pushback from everyone, including professionals, and even people gatekeeping in the ND population.

When you're sick*, your entire body becomes inflamed, even your nervous system, and that fucks everything up. Further, if you are more sensitive and have sensory needs (almost certainly do), you're being overwhelmed by unwanted sensations (body aches, heightened sense of smell, headaches, runny nose, coughs) and are unlikely to have the energy to stim to help regulate.

Best course is to try to minimize all the unwanted sensations and check out mentally until your immune system does its thing. AKA, get some rest.

I wouldn't put much hope in current medical science with this question, they still have no idea what the heck COVID does, mechanically speaking, just that it fucks shit up in a way that may lead to respiratory failure. And that's with all the money in the world. No one is doing deep dives into how someone that's neurodivergent feels differently bad when they are sick. Heck, they don't really deal with anyone's symptoms while they are sick, it's just basic painkillers and barely better than placebo cough syrup. The only mental vital they even take is pain, which ND people either answer very low to (resulting in being told to go away), or very high to (resulting in being told you are exaggerating, drug seeking, and to go away). Maybe if they could measure the level of stimulation and figure out a safe baseline, and at what point we start becoming traumatically overstimulated, then medicated for that, I'd have a bit more faith in the system. Since they can't even measure pain, maybe at least ask us how stimulated we feel instead of our pain levels. Anything over a 7 should be treated with something that helps us cool off. But what the fuck do I know.

Thanks for the suggestion, but I think it's too shallow vs the actual experience. The depth at which ND people are marginalized is so far and away under presented today. Most of the established science is just wrong and resistant to the reality that ND led researchers are presenting. We need to do better at advocating for ourselves as an entire group with shared experiences and unique mental and physical health issues.

The next best analogy I've heard so far is NT people are Windows based software running in a Windows based world, ND people are MacOS software being forced to run on Windows (suspend your IT mind about how it wouldn't work at all, and understand that for a lot of ND folks, it doesn't). Get on the correct runtime environment and a lot of issues go away. That's just really hard to do when the world is primarily built for the 85%-95% NT population, and many of the most capable in the ND population are either ignorant or in denial due to lack of acknowledgement, and stigmatization of anything that would be acknowledged.

People can not agree with what I'm saying, I'm sure it sounds absurd especially if you are NT. I doubt I would have agreed with it two years ago, but introspection after my own realizations that I'm autistic, after over 30+ years of living with this brain, I understand things quite differently now.

For lack of a more relatable analogy, I've been using this race based one.

Imagine you're a black child in America in the 1960s and 1970s, but you somehow managed to remain ignorant of that fact until sometime in your teens or early adulthood. Maybe the area was really progressive, parents wanted to shield you from reality, whatever you need to imagine is fine. You end up not understanding this fact about yourself, and then you end up in the racist public. Now, imagine that the racist public never comes outright and says anything directly racist to you, but all of their other behavior is exactly like what you'd expect from racists in the 1970s. How do you come to terms with this reality? You must be doing something wrong for people to treat you this way.

Obviously not a perfect analogy, and I don't really like to compare my issues as a ND person with the awful stuff done to black people back then, and that continues to be done today. Anyway, it's not inaccurate, if anything, the differences between ND people and NT people are greater than any outward racial appearance, and worse, ND people aren't really aware they are being marginalized, and NT people don't really understand that they are marginalizing.

I'm in love with using wago lever nuts for this stuff now. Makes later maintenance so much easier, and totally avoids wire nuts. Manages to be less wire stuffing in the box too.

And the product updates will happen without you asking them to! And if you disable them, seemingly unrelated windows updates will helpfully fix your mistake.