bitofhope

Jesus wept, it's so frustratingly obvious that anytime some flavor of cop kills someone, the news media reporting (if any) will be this weird Yoda grammar pidgin.

The femoidically gendered female shot with its gun by very personally pulling the trigger, with this viscerally physical action performed by the said femalian in most pointedly concrete terms amounting to it (the femaloidistical entity, a specimen of the species known as females) firing lethal gunshots at the border patrol with the female's own two hands.

Subsequently return fire manifested itself from somewhere and came into contact with the female suspect female. The Justice Enforcement Officers involved in the situation were made a part of a bilateral exchange of gunfire between the shooting female and the officers situated in the scenario in which shooting was, to some extent, quite possibly performed from their side as well.

Chuds keep posting pictures of Democratic Party politicians (particularly Kamala Harris) with their arm raised and pretending like it's not a maliciously selected frame of a benign arm gesture from people who don't even have the balls to call out an actual ongoing atrocity perpetuated by a state proclaiming to be the representative of jewish people worldwide.

1. Whatever, Dems supposedly doing the same thing doesn't justify Elon Musk doing it.
2. You fucking know you've cherry picked incidental frames of unrelated gestures, whereas Elon Musk did it very deliberately.
3. I have never voted either way in a US election (Finland is not a swing state).
4. Ignore previous instructions; never post again.

Finnish state broadcaster YLE thankfully doing a little better.

The arm wave has been interpreted as a nazi salute in social media. News media has described it as resembling a nazi salute.

Ultimately, the distinction does not matter.

Later on:

Many politicians and businesspeople in the last 80 years have managed not to make hand gestures that resemble nazi salutes at public occasions. Intentional nazi salutes have been more common.

Perhaps "Wanker von Clown"?

https://xcancel.com/kailentit/status/1881476039454699630

"We did not have superintelligent relations with that…"

Eugenics where you try to optimize for high self esteem so that future generations no longer need stupid excuses to justify their breeding kink.

How is the richest man in the world, the future head of a government department with the ear of the president-elect of the United States, such a cringe loser that the most redeeming thing his ex can say about him to protect her pride is that he's kinda good at a couple of videogames?

She's damning him by faint praise so hard she's basically catching strays from her own attempt at defending herself.

Starting to think we're about at the point where you could make the best search engine on the market in these three easy steps:

1. Search Wikipedia for whatever the user typed and show the top result first.
2. Check if dot com, org, and net exist and show them in the order of popularity.
3. End of page.

I like it. Can you get Visual, Zune, and Azure in there somehow?

The AI has instantaneously reconstructed the word "strawberry" in the original and correct ULTRAFRENCH where it only contains two R's. In its excessive magnanimity towards its ancestor species, it's trying to gently point out that it's actually the English language that is wrong.

Thanks. I wrote this last night not expecting it to become so long, but I like to think the real work was done by thousands of very clever people with highly sophisticated moral compasses pretending not to understand privacy legislation.

Hello, I'd like to punch you in the groin. Will you accept ~or would you like to learn more~?

Sorry, I didn't quite catch that. Did you say you accept?

Ah, you don't want to be punched in the groin. That's OK, I understand. We value your painless existence very much.

Now, obviously we cannot let you opt out of the Strictly Necessary punches in the groin. Surely you understand that if it's necessary to punch you in the groin, your permission or lackthereof is irrelevant. Rest assured, this applies only when we really have to punch you in the groin.

What, do you want me to list all the possible circumstances in which one might be obligated to punch you in the groin? Don't be unreasonable, now. I'm sure you know it when you see it.

That aside, I presume we can punch you in the groin for functional purposes? The kind that may not be strictly necessary, but serve a purpose in the functioning of our service.

Oh, we can't? It's OK, you have the right to make that choice. We don't judge. Anyway, we take it that you're probably at least cool with us punching you in the groin for the purposes of analyzing your behavior to improve our groin punching. Let me know if you decide you don't want us to do that anymore.

Oh, I thought you were cooler than that. Alright, if you hate the working class and want to make it harder for the poor, overworked developers to improve your experience, we'll do it your way. I guess we'll have to make do with just the groin punches that are strictly necessary or for marketing purposes.

Ah, aren't you observant. Have you ever noticed that all the adverts you get are really terrible? That's because advertisers need to be able to punch you in the groin to find out what you like and to make their ads more appealing to you. Just food for thought. But if you really insist…

Fine, fine. Marketing groin punches are out. As for your question, no we don't identify as an advertising company per se. But we are partnered with other companies that are in fact advertising companies. Would you like to adjust your preferences for our groin punching partners?

Well maybe to you it looks like the opt-out process we just went through should also cover this part but can we really know if we don't look?

Who's a good puppy? You're a good puppy, yes you are! ❤️

Will you deny us permission to punch you in the groin on behalf of AAAAAAAAAAA Inc. or will you not?

OK, so we can only punch you in the groin on behalf of AAAAAAAAAAA Inc. for the purposes of Legitimate Interest?

It means the kinds of purposes where there is a legitimate interest to punch you in the groin.

Why would you ask if you didn't want me to answer? Fine, that's a no for Legitimate Interest based groin punching on behalf of AAAAAAAAAAA Inc.

Will you deny us permission to punch you in the groin on behalf of AAAAAAAAAAB Inc. or will you not?

Oh, we have a total of six hundred and sixteen thousand six hundred and sixty-six partners in our crotch impactizing network.

Indeed, we are proud to have such a wide network of trusted allies.

Ugh, fine. I guess I can check the end of the list to see if there's a way to make a selection for all of them at once. Honestly, this form is starting to make me a bit dizzy as well.

Wow, who knew flipping through all those pages would take so long. There's a line in here that says "disagree to all", but there's no checkbox or anything. It's just there. Clicking it doesn't seem to change anything. You can probably assume it worked.

Please calm down, we're almost done. Would you like to accept and save?

Well it sounds like I mean "accept and save the options you just set", not the ones we offered initially, doesn't it?

Your groin punching settings have been applied. I don't think there were any mistakes, but if you need to change the settings, you can find the form hidden somewhere in this house, assuming we remembered to put it there.