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Happy April 20th! (slrpnk.net)
submitted 3 months ago by NekoRogue@slrpnk.net to c/memes@lemmy.ml
[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 23 points 3 months ago

When I learned some people can't watch something with subtitles I was so confused, because ADHD auditory processing issues mean I really can't hear without subtitles. If I don't have subtitles on my mind wanders off without me and I have to keep rewinding because I missed something. I remember buying a ticket to Pan's Labyrinth in theatres a long time ago and being baffled when the person in the ticket booth warned me that it had subtitles. Took waaaay too long for me to get diagnosed.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 38 points 3 months ago

"What the fuck is Pokémon?" -a real quote by Danny Devito

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 16 points 3 months ago

Do you know what type of ADHD she has? Knowing that might change things a bit.

This is going to be really long, but I hope you find some of it useful for your situation. I don't know how your wife's ADHD presents, but I'm diagnosed with combined type ADHD, social anxiety, and depression, and I'm a woman around the same age as your wife. The things my partner does that really help me the most is to help make things easy and accessible for me.

I struggle a lot with executive dysfunction, and if I'm overwhelmed it tends to compound into paralysis. I have a lot of trouble staying organized and I'm constantly losing things, which causes me to be late a lot, and when I'm late my anxiety gets worse.

I try to think about things I do every day, and make them available to do in as few steps as possible. I like to keep items I use frequently near the area I use them in, kept together with other items needed to complete the task in little "kits" so that it doesn't take much thought to do daily stuff.

Think minimalist, uncluttered, functional areas. For example, if she drinks coffee every morning, have the mugs on a stand near the coffee maker, have the coffee already in the coffee maker so she only needs to start it, and keep any sweeteners, etc she always uses near the mugs.

Another example, going to work is particularly stressful for me, so I try to lessen the amount of decisions and prep I have to do before hand. Getting all of my clothes and things I bring to work together the night before I have to work helps me a lot, because it lessens the chances of me being late, which helps with the anxiety overall.

For me, it feels like every decision I have to make, every lost item I have to find, every time I leave the room to get something and immediately forget what I went to get, my energy is drained. So minimizing these problems makes everything so much easier.

If I'm really struggling, a messy area makes anything I have to do so much worse. If I feel like I can't do anything at all and the room is dirty and chaotic, everything is going to be so much harder. I don't know if your wife's symptoms are similar to mine, but if I'm a zombie and I can't do anything and I'm doomscrolling Lemmy too much, having my partner help me by tidying the area around me makes a big difference. I feel like I can function a bit better.

There are times when I look like I'm being lazy, but I'm not. I might look like I'm just sitting around doing nothing or scrolling or playing some dopamine-extracting game all day, but in my head I'm thinking about how I want to do everything and I'm screaming at myself to do something, but I just...can't. I don't know if she has exacutive dysfunction like I do, but when it happens to me, I appreciate that my partner doesn't make it worse by making me feel guilty about being "lazy," because it's not laziness at all.

Another thing my partner does that helps me with executive dysfunction is to just...put stuff near me. I like to paint, so if I'm stuck in "couch mode" too long, my partner will get my painting supplies and put everything I need within my reach. Eliminating steps really makes it easier to break the trance, and sometimes I'll just start painting without thinking about it.

Sometimes decision making is particularly difficult for me and it requires a lot of mental energy when I'm feeling especially bad. If this is an issue for her, I would suggest trying to make choices as simple as possible. For example, instead of saying "what do you want for dinner?" you could say "I'm feeling like Italian or Chinese food tonight, do either of those sound good to you?" I feel like my mental energy is limited, especially if I'm in a depression, and making decisions simpler helps preserve it.

You both might like the "How to ADHD" channel on YouTube. She talks about ADHD from a woman's perspective and some of her advice has been helpful for me. I sometimes show some of her videos to my partner because it helps him understand how I feel and think a bit better.

And of course, if you can, get her into counseling and/or medication as soon as possible.

Soooo yeah. Long response but I hope some of it was useful. Your wife is really lucky to have a partner who is making an effort to help and understand. Having support is so important. I wish you both luck! ADHD is not fun but there are ways to make it much easier. Feel free to AMA if I can help you in any way!

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 27 points 3 months ago

I searched for more information about this picture, and found more from the photo shoot. Classic horror stars with cats. Pretty adorable.

Link to the photo set

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 26 points 3 months ago

As a former dasher myself, dashers are expecting that because it needs to be worth the time, cost of gas, and wear and tear on their car to even do the order.

Doordash only pays around $2.50 per order. If it's a really bad one (long distance, a slow restaurant that takes up a lot of time, long driving distance) DoorDash might add a dollar or two to get someone to take it. If your food is cold, it's probably because no one wanted to take your order because it wasn't worth it, so you have to wait until a driver who doesn't understand that they're spending more money than they're making takes a bad order. Sometimes the restaurant is slow or says an order is ready when it isn't. The "tip" is pretty much the whole pay for the order. And if the tip is really good, sometimes DoorDash takes part of it without telling anyone.

Also, DoorDash doesn't always show you the whole tip amount. There's a note that says "the actual tip may be higher." Usually it's not, but they leave that "maybe" in there to bait you into acceptimg orders that cost more to deliver than you earn.

There are definitely some shitty drivers. But a lot of people don't have a choice but to do gig jobs. People with disabilities who need to have flexible schedules because they don't qualify for disability assistance and they can't commit to a schedule because of random symptom flare ups. People with criminal records. People with social anxiety. Minorities. People learning English.

DoorDash is to blame here, not the drivers. They need to call it something other than a "tip." The suggested "tip" amount should be based on the driving distance, not a percentage of the order cost. And they should pay drivers more out of the "service fees" they get for sitting back doing nothing and letting the app print money for them.

Let's blame the right people here.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 25 points 3 months ago
[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 12 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
342

Praise the Lord 🍑

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submitted 6 months ago by NekoRogue@slrpnk.net to c/news@lemmy.world

Got this in an email from the Florida Department of Health today. Someone get me out of this crazy state.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 29 points 6 months ago

I feel like they did it on purpose for the attention. Otherwise what would a "memorable edge" be? A screenshot of a website? They knew what they were doing.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 20 points 6 months ago

That's definitely Roger from American Dad.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 24 points 7 months ago

He always looks like the "pompous buffoon" character in a Jane Austen novel who looks at the main character and says "I shall have her! She will learn to love me!" before she marries the one who doesn't...act like that.

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 36 points 9 months ago

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of human companionship, Flareon is objectively the most huggable Pokemon? While their maximum temperature is likely too much for most, they are capable of controlling it, so they can set themselves to the perfect temperature for you. Along with that, they have a lot of fluff, making them undeniably incredibly soft to touch. But that's not all, they have a very respectable special defense stat of 110, which means that they are likely very calm and resistant to emotional damage. Because of this, if you have a bad day, you can vent to it while hugging it, and it won't mind. It can make itself even more endearing with moves like Charm and Baby Doll Eyes, ensuring that you never have a prolonged bout of depression ever again.

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submitted 10 months ago by NekoRogue@slrpnk.net to c/memes@lemmy.ml
6

Share with us your ancient texts. Praised be the lolcatz!

[-] NekoRogue@slrpnk.net 22 points 11 months ago

For me, it was when he had a woman on his show who had gained a significant amount of weight, after being sexually assaulted multiple times, in order to appear more unattractive to men. Dr. Phil told her to lose weight, and to stop "letting men use your body as a playground."

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NekoRogue

joined 1 year ago