I'm writing some javascript (for the web) for the first time in a long time and I am realizing that I would be well served by using a bit of tooling like eslint and standardjs.

I am reluctantly willing to apt install nodejs but I am not willing to use npm because of my impression that it is a fractal of yolo curl | bash philosophy which will randomly install and automatically run malware or indistinguishable-from-malware garbage I don't want.

So, my question is: how can I install things like standardjs without using npm?

Please do not tell me that I should just use npm.