this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2026
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 102 points 1 month ago (107 children)

Sounds like Atheism, like all belief systems, empowered an asshole with self-righteous validation. Even if you bet on the right horse, it doesn't mean everything you do is automatically justified; empathy is a higher order law.

[–] superduperpirate@lemmy.world 32 points 1 month ago

empathy is a higher order law.

Anon forgot that having an asshole doesn’t mean you should regularly act like one.

[–] GandalftheBlack@feddit.org 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Atheism isn't really a belief system by itself. It can refer to a lot of things, including positive atheism (the claim that there is not/cannot be a god/supernatural entity), negative atheism (the lack of belief in a deity due to lack of evidence), the absence of religion and many other things. Militant atheism, on the other hand, definitely counts and is susceptible to all the failings you mentioned.

[–] edible_funk@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (4 children)

It's not called militant atheism, you're describing anti-theism. I've never heard of atheism claiming definitively that there are no deities or higher powers either, just that since there's no evidence the claims aren't worth consideration and can be dismissed as nonsense.

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[–] GarboDog@lemmy.world 81 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Anon blames Atheism for being a pos

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] GarboDog@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (7 children)

That’s very true, we never believed in Christmas/religion but never spoiled/ruined it for others, it was their enjoyment.

Granted when we have a kid, we don’t think we’ll be telling them that “Santa is just a famous character of Christmas, and some people have fun believing he’s real, so don’t ruin their fun either” or something like that. Still have plenty of years to think of how to word it better lol :P

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Honestly, I think i will "lie" about Santa. Simply because it doesn't really matter and it is fun for them.

[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) (2 children)

Yeah, its pretty obvious peoppe are lying anout Santa once you realize the North Pole has no land.

Santa clearly is from the South Pole.

Pretty genius actually, getting people to look for him on the opposite side of the planet.

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[–] untorquer@quokk.au 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My dad beat the shit out of me

I don't think it was so much about religion or ruining it for others.

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[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago

To their credit, they're well aware they were being a turd.

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[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 75 points 1 month ago (3 children)

chocolate doesnt grow on trees

bruh

[–] Technus@lemmy.zip 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

This had me thinking of why the english language uses cocoa. Obviously it is cacao, most other languages use the real name as well. One of those "too hard to pronounce" situations? Habit from referring to the beans? Though that second option doesnt really answer the question, why cocoa and not cacao 🫠

[–] StillAlive@piefed.world 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Raw ingredients aren't the final product. Cows don't produce cheese.

[–] CarstenBoll@feddit.dk 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If you shake the cow before milking it does!

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[–] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I just pictured milking string cheese out of an udder, and so you have to suffer too.

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[–] Ariselas@piefed.ca 53 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Great thing about atheism Anon, no one made ha do that shit but you, and you get to take full responsibility for your actions without the cop-out of "demonic possession". Take that beating with pride knowing that you posses radical freedom.

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[–] BeUnique@lemmy.zip 22 points 1 month ago

Anon learns the hard way that for most families, Christmas has nothing to do with Christianity especially when kids are involved.

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 19 points 1 month ago

Speaking as someone who was a born nihilist, atheism ain't got shit to do with that, you were just a reactionary turd. Get in to goth like a normal person.

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Yeah that period of time, where you believe nothing matters, so consequences don't matter, until you realize that just because it doesn't matter in the long run, it still sucks and you still have to deal with it, is one of the more challenging aspects of childhood atheism.

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[–] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 month ago (2 children)

science doesn't allow chocolate to grow on trees

SMRT

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[–] wrinkledoo@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

What's annoying about religious people discussing atheism(which happens every time it's brought up) is that they invariably assume atheists also have religious thinking. Like I must go to atheist church every Sunday to convince myself there's no god. It betrays either a lack of empathy or a lack of honesty.

Nah, I tended my garden, had some coffee, and going to have some tacos later. I only think about religion when it's brought up, usually when I see a billboard telling me my life is worthless and magic daddy is gonna have me for barbeque after I die.

[–] iocase@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It betrays a lack of theory of mind, likely indicating they're below a fuzzy sort of threshold below which you don't have the cognitive bandwidth to imagine a perspective beyond your own.

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[–] IAMgROOT@lemmy.wtf 15 points 1 month ago (9 children)

he must be frightened to think about cocoa trees!

or genetically modifying trees to grow whatever you want!!!!! 😱😱😱😱

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[–] webp@mander.xyz 15 points 1 month ago

Anon the grinch

[–] BigBoyShuanzee@aussie.zone 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

As someone who has spent plenty of time on 4chan. It's people from all over the world just wanting to be hugged, they are miserable but it's because they want to be loved.

My 4chan experience is using the video game board almost exclusively for over a decade.

The right wingers hate black people and trans people and all only look for porn with black people or trans people.

4chan exists beyond the understanding of regular people. It's lunacy, it's maddening. But it's fun.

Right wingers keep trying to force their nonsense ideals and then they go to the porn boards and look at interracial cuckolding and trans porn.. They hate themselves and they take it out on the rest of us.

I am not an American, I've got so many problems with my own country.

Good luck to you Trans people.. I'm a straight white man from Australia and I'm sleeping on the couch unable to avoid how scared I am of my Chinese wife. Anxiety and depression live in my brain telling me to kill myself all the time.

I wish I could be born with a different brain. Sorry that was insensitive.. You've lived your entire life that way.. I'm only at about year 25 living 37 years.

[–] VeryBlandUsername@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Think of all the Republicans who get outed as gay. It's why Grindr gets overloaded when the RNC comes into town.

A bunch of closeted folk who can't accept themselves end up in the Republican party and turning into some of the most hateful and spiteful people imaginable who just want others to hurt as well.

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[–] cholesterol@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

That dad? Albert Einstein.

[–] Phil_in_here@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 month ago

"You know what I hate the most about religion? Its the way they try to shove their beliefs down your throat!"

[–] EmilieEasie@fedinsfw.app 7 points 1 month ago

It sounds like anonny learned a valuable lesson that day

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago (3 children)

That may be the one time when a (gay and fake) parent beating the shit out of their (fake and gay) kid is justified

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[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

science doesnt allow chocolate to be grown on trees

Not with that attitude it doesnt. Give us a few hundred years and we'll have them growing it fully formed, with caramel inside.

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[–] clifmo@programming.dev 5 points 1 month ago

A belief system made me do it. Yea, sure it did bud

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

This is basivi when somebody tries to be an atheist in a dogmatic, religious way.

Being atheist, at least to me, means that you don't care about any of that crap, you just try to be a nice person and let others be

I'm "militant" enough to wish that all religions would be prohibited as they're nothing but tools for control, but I won't beat someone over the head for believing in fairytales

[–] Gregers@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Seems like atheist in predominantly religious societies tend to behave a bit different, and I can understand that teenagers would want to make a big deal out of it.

My parents were atheists, and so have I been my entire life. But we still celebrated Christmas because it was nice and a tradition. We didn't go to church or do any religious stuff during Christmas, but ate a traditional Christmas meal, had a Christmas tree, presents and what not.

Religion was just not a topic at all, unless religious people did stupid stuff in the name of religion

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[–] FavouriteShapes@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"I have removed the chocolate from the tree. Science doesn't allow chocolate to grow on trees"

Anon science'd so hard he because a superstitious nutcase (many such cases). This is completely zealot brained.

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