this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2026

23 points (100.0% liked)

Stop Drinking

1539 readers

38 users here now

This is a place to motivate each other to control or stop drinking. It is also a place for non drinkers to discuss and share.

We welcome anyone who wishes to join in by asking for advice, sharing our experiences and stories, or just encouraging someone who is trying to quit or cut down.

Please post only when sober; you’re welcome to read in the meanwhile.

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

Zerlyna@lemmy.world

rosamundi@lemmy.world

My first Friday (feddit.org)

submitted 21 hours ago by mech@feddit.org to c/stopdrinking@lemmy.world

12 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I quit drinking last Sunday.

This time, not "for a month", or "only on special occasions", or "not at home", or "not during the week".
I tried all those before, many times.
Last week it hit me like a hammer: I'm an alcoholic, and have been for over 20 years. The realization what I had lost to alcohol in all those years made me weep.

And it had reached a point where I could already see the bottomless pit that would swallow my life, looming ahead, closer than expected.
I still have half my life ahead of me, so the only choice was to stop walking towards that cliff.
And that meant: I won't drink anymore. Ever.

What surprised me was how easy the decision was. And the strength of my resolve.

But now it's Friday. I'm off work. It's 5pm.
And for about half an hour, all my resolve was just gone. "Hey you made it through the week, let's celebrate and relax."

I managed to not buy the usual sixpack and bottle of wine on the way home, which feels like a great achievement. But that half hour where suddenly something in me just casually swiped away the decision I had made scared the hell out of me.

I'm strong, but apparently at any point I can just stop being me for a moment, so does that strength really protect me?

top 12 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] rosamundi@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

Welcome, we're glad to have you here.

Alcohol is physically and mentally addictive. It's habit-forming, you get used to consuming, and your body and brain start expecting, alcohol in certain circumstances.

"It's Friday, time for a glass of wine." "It's a sunny Saturday, wheres my chilled glass of rosè?" etc. It will take time to overlay the old habits, the old neural pathways, with new habits. It sounds like you have some old hobbies you can pick up again? That will definitely help. My one rule I never broke, even when I was drinking a bottle of wine a night, was "no drinking and sewing, that's dangerous." And I saved up my booze money and my 1 year sobriety present was a very fancy sewing machine.

[–] luthis@lemmy.nz 3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Well here's my 2 cents. I stopped drinking, lasted 3 months. I got back into it heavily again. Eventually, I got withdrawls. Let me tell you. Withdrawls are worse than any hangover. They are worse than any experience you have had.

I have severe anxiety around alcohol now. I don't even want a sip. Because I know where that sip leads. And I never ever ever ever want to go there again. Trust me on this, if you don't stop, you will get there eventually like I did.

The threat of something intangible isn't much to keep you off the beer. But count yourself very lucky you don't know how bad it would have got for you. Drinking just isn't worth it.

[–] mech@feddit.org 1 points 2 hours ago

But count yourself very lucky you don’t know how bad it would have got for you. Drinking just isn’t worth it.

I truly am. I was still able to stop without medical intervention, and hopefully without permanent damage.
The thought of losing my health, my wits, or the ability to live an active outdoor life scares the shit out of me.

[–] Josey_Wales@lemmy.zip 6 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

I’ll be 11 years sober this year. It gets much easier. You’re breaking a habit. Your mind will rationalize and justify just about anything to get a fix (nicotine, sugar, alcohol, etc). Hell, I have quit smoking and drinking and I still struggle with late night snacking.

But over time you get stronger. In the early days it pays to go to support groups/ get a mentor. Changing your lifestyle will require you do more than just stop drinking. You may have to adjust how you socialize and destress as well.

If you stumble, be kind but firm with yourself. Learn from the mistake, adjust, and try again.

[–] disevani@lemmy.world 3 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (1 children)

Yes, that strenght will protect you. I felt the same for quite some time, but now i'm in my 6th year been sober, all thanks to that strenght! And don't worry about not feeling yourself. Now that you are sober, you actually just started being yourself again! It takes time to get used to that, so just take that time :)

I'm very happy for you! Keep up the good work.

[–] mech@feddit.org 2 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

you actually just started being yourself again

That's another thing that scares me. I was drinking for my entire adult life, so I really have no idea what being myself sober will be like.

[–] disevani@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

That's going to be a little tough at first, but you'll get used to it pretty fast!

To help that proces going, try to find some things to do.

Summary of my proces (if it's okay if i share that):

first couple of weeks/months: i made sure to clean up my house (and keeping it that way) and took some longer showers. Made a little walk as often as i think i could handle. Started eating more veggies and fruit, preparing them is just as helpful as it is for your health! After a while i felt more in control just by doing such simple things.
After the first years: i started doing charity work and moved to my own appartment! Within the second year of being sober i managed to also quit smoking. I kept doing the things i listed above, without adding much to it. Now, i felt really in control, but i often had a hard time enjoying the sober life.
I'm ~5,5 years further. Now i have managed to pickup even more charity work, i workout 4 times a week for over a year now and even more since last week, i'm learning how to play some instruments and make music, i started a diet a year ago and love eating my everyday carrot snack time, i have healthy and good contact with friends and family, i've renovated my appartment and have some money on the bank, i even joined a photography club and go out with my cameras a lot!

Life has become enjoyable again! I still have moment where everything seems dark, but everyone has that. That's okay. I get through that.
And so do you! You have made the first important steps and you've found your true motivation. The hardest part is over. Now, enjoy your new life. If you ever need to talk, i'm (and we are) here.

[–] mech@feddit.org 2 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Your comment just made me tear up -
I used to love to hike, rock-climb, sew, decorate, cook, did charitable work in a youth center, trained for a marathon, learnt the guitar and did photography...back when I didn't drink as much.
I just...stopped doing all those things one by one.
On one hand, that makes me incredibly sad right now.
But on the other hand, I guess I have these things to return to. It kinda feels like waking up from a long sleep. I still have 3 guitars, 5 cameras and my camping gear laying around and collecting dust.

[–] disevani@lemmy.world 2 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I hope it is the good kind of feeling sad, i hope i didn't make you feel like crap... If so, im truly sorry!

If you enjoyed all those things then, try them out again! But only continue if you feel happy doing them. Don't force it. Take it slow, and just experience it! Whatever you feel, that's okay :)

With 3 guitars and 5 cameras, i'm sure you can pickup the love you had for them again. Creativity is what i love most, and what helps me out the most.

[–] mech@feddit.org 2 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

No, you didn't make me feel bad, I'm just grieving a bit for the time I wasted.
And now my cat snapped me out of it, by toppling over the empty beer cans that still stand next to my desk.
She wants me to clean up, I guess. Thanks for your support and kind words!

[–] disevani@lemmy.world 2 points 16 hours ago

I'm glad to hear it (grieving is okay), and happy to help. And you better listen to your cat! She sounds very wise ;)

Goodluck with all!

[–] reallyzen@lemmy.ml 2 points 20 hours ago

Congrats so far. That Friday 5pm Battle was a Great Victory!

When you're an alcoholic, you stay one, and that is why you can't drink, ...and probably will crave it for a very long time.

I'm almost at 2 years - 22 months and 20 days. And it is still part of me, part of who I am. I know why I don't drink, and I have it reminded to myself very often: as addiction goes, alcohol is so pervasively embedded in society that it keeps our resolve on its toes.

You seem fairly lucid, and you reached your conclusion all by yourself. Congrats on this too, I needed an addiction clinic to get to that point, and then meds to overcome it.

Life without alcohol is quieter, more serene. I miss the stuff of course, but life is just better now.

Nothing protects you but yourself. You know that and you seems to have a good grasp of it.

Enjoy your new life!