this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2026
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Privacy

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Privacy for me has been incredibly rewarding, but when talking to people who haven't been introduced to privacy, there are occasionally some moments that make it exhausting. One conversation in particular is one that I've had to go through dozens of times, and it always goes along these lines:

  • Alice: Why is your phone in airplane mode? / What's your phone number?
  • Bob: I don't have a carrier.
  • Alice: But you have a phone.
  • Bob: Yes.
  • Alice: How do you not have a carrier?
  • Bob: Phones can come without a carrier.
  • Alice: What do you use it for?
  • Bob: Everything you use yours for.
  • Alice: How do you talk to people?
  • Bob: Messaging apps over Wi-Fi.
  • Alice: What if you don't have Wi-Fi?
  • Bob: Public Wi-Fi is everywhere. If I don't have Wi-Fi, I likely don't need to get in touch.
  • Alice: What about emergencies?
  • Bob: I can still contact emergency services.

Each time it happens, it has a unique flavor. One person accused me of lying and then fraud. I know people are just curious and don't mean to be rude, but it makes me die a little inside every time someone asks. I've begun trying to sidestep the conversation entirely:

  • Alice: Why is your phone in airplane mode?
  • Bob: To save battery.

or:

  • Alice: What's your phone number?
  • Bob: You can contact me with an app called Signal.

People seem to think that a phone automatically comes with a carrier and that it'll stop working if you don't have one. In reality, I'm saving hundreds of dollars per year while avoiding spam, fraud, breaches, surveillance, and being chronically online. People have a hard time coping with those who do things a little differently.

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[–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 6 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

Technology can be adapted to everyone's unique workflow.

Yours is a highly specialised one, that apparently works for you. Something i may try for a day or two, but am confident can never adapt to my work flow. (Only know 2 "free" WiFi spots in my town. One wants an account. The other wants a phone number)

[–] hector@lemmy.today 3 points 13 hours ago

I almost downloaded a phone thingy online to use for these silicon valley parasites, and like amazon, but on the security warnings I backed off.

What is the best way to securely get a phone number to use and keep, for free, online? Can one do that with signal? I thought you needed a working phone number for that?

[–] brucethemoose@lemmy.world 6 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Playing devil’s advocate, I think it’s reasonable to have a load-up-minutes dumb phone, in case family dies or something and they don’t have access to the right app. That’s reasonable for close family to get upset about.

But you also don’t have to give that number out, heh.

I guess you could use Google Voice too, but that’s a bit… counterproductive unless you can sandbox the app.

[–] Charger8232@lemmy.ml 2 points 16 hours ago

I think it’s reasonable to have a load-up-minutes dumb phone

Those are becoming harder and harder to find. It's hard to even find prepaid SIM cards. You now have to buy a voucher, create an account, and add it there, which activates the phone for the number of months the voucher is worth.

[–] Sunsofold@lemmings.world 8 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Public wi-fi is definitely not everywhere, but yeah, either you take joy in sharing the knowledge you have or you end up being a bit rude to prevent being asked.

[–] Taldan@lemmy.world 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

That's going to be highly dependent on where you live. In Tokyo I easily got around without service for years since there was wifi at every train station and convenience store

[–] Sunsofold@lemmings.world 1 points 30 minutes ago

Not to be overly pedantic on the internet but something's availability being 'dependent on where' is definitionally 'not everywhere.'

[–] Clairvoidance@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 day ago (3 children)

hundreds of dollars per year? That's how much a carrier is over there??

[–] Charger8232@lemmy.ml 3 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

That’s how much a carrier is over there??

Yes. The "poverty" option is $15/month, but plans can easily go up to $100 or more per month. Out of curiosity, how much are they charging across the pond?

[–] Clairvoidance@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

Yeah as a Dane, (different from dutch above) mobile's usually between €8-15, we do have plans that go higher, but 4G 30GB per month I figure is pretty survivable unless it's your only net (mine's 10GB :P)

[–] gerryflap@feddit.nl 1 points 12 hours ago

Damn what the hell. I'm Dutch and I pay less than €12 euros. For that I get 100 call minutes/messages and 6 GB. Neither of which I ever really get close to. Calling is mostly just in case of emergency or when we need to align something right now. And data is always useful because I definitely do not have free wifi anywhere. Do you never leave a big city or something? If I slip with my bike on an icy road and break something in the middle of nowhere it's kinda good to have some way of communicating.

[–] clay_pidgin@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm on a popular discount carrier, and it's ~$30/month. One of the big three carriers will easily charge $100/month.

Most people will try to find a family plan that lowers the cost per user but it comes with big caveats like long-ish term contracts and some nasty fine-print. And if your carrier gets bought out, which is happening a lot, you never know what changes might get force fed to you

[–] axus@lemmy.ca 4 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago) (1 children)

I'm paying over $100 per month for 3 lines. 4th line is $6 a month from Tello

[–] Humorless4483@lemmy.world 2 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

How much data do you have at that price ? I’m paying 19€/month for 4 lines, 3 at 5€/month with 30Gb and one at 4€/month for 25Gb

[–] Taldan@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago

Damn that's cheap. I pay $50/month per person, for unlimited

[–] MarriedCavelady50@lemmy.ml 15 points 1 day ago

This is the scene from Parks and Rec where Ron Swanson has to eventually concede to getting a flip phone.

[–] spicehoarder@lemmy.zip 1 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

Public WiFi and privacy in the same sentence? lolololol! You use McAfee too?

[–] pineapple@lemmy.ml 2 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

Using public wifi with no protections is already pretty secure since most things are encrypted now days. Using a trusted vpn to encrypt all of your traffic makes it almost perfect, since no people in the same network as you can have the faintest clue as to what your doing.

edit: It's probably not almost perfect but definetly far better than using mobile data.

[–] Taldan@lemmy.world 5 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

It's not 2005 any more. Public wifi can easily be used securely these days

[–] spicehoarder@lemmy.zip -1 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Whatever lets you sleep at night.

[–] Sal@mander.xyz 3 points 14 hours ago

I'm curious about an example that comes to your mind as you say this. In your view, what is a privacy risk associated with public WiFi use that is not easily mitigated?

[–] utopiah@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

So... I'm kind of in the same situation but mine is actually by mistake. Namely my SIM somehow (OK maybe I tinkered with eSIM a bit much... anyway) works for data and SMS but not for calls. I tried to fix it a bit... then honestly I like it without. Most of the calls I received are not important, nor urgent, and the few that are can leave a message or an SMS.

I stopped relying on my phone for calls entirely and I like it.

When I tell people it doesn't work they just shrug it off and always find a way to contact me without making a big deal out of it.

I still like having a SIM though if only to

  • check where I am on a path the first time I get there
  • know if the person I'm meeting might be late
  • warn if I'm late on the way to somewhere

but typically my phone works well entirely offline (e.g. I do not stream music, I have actual files on my phone) so I understand.

Honestly in your shoes I'd gauge the person, if they are potentially interesting enough to explore the topic with curiosity, I'd be honest. If I just want to move on because they seem obtuse I'd keep it to the minimum.

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I achieve the same by disabling VoLTE and VoWiFi and setting the phone to LTE only in *#*#4636#*#*.

I love these service menus. *#*#3646633#*#* has so much stuff to permanently screw up on some MediaTeks. But also some useful ones like selection of frequency bands, or even specific frequency and cell id.
But yeah, some settings can persist factory reset, and some may even be illegal like Tx tests (verified that it does transmit garbage on selected frequency with SDR) or IMEI change. Not all settings are on all devices, and they may even be partially broken.

But yeah, these settings are don't touch it for the most part (some are just huge lists of undocumented variables). Some don't even seem to be resettable from the menu, I mean menus where you select one option, but by default they are unset. And the band mode selection on Moto G54 5G was... interesting. Rather than a nice selection menu, you can type in a number and select to add or remove it from a vector variable for 4G and 5G. Of course, nowhere does it list valid options or give a reset button.

And lastly a thing that serves me as a warning for future, when I was playing around with a leaked service program for some Realtek Ethernet adapter, I found out what eFuse memory is. There is no going back.

[–] HexaBack@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

that first number singlehandedly helped me fix my mom's phone. for context, 5g reception is quite mediocre where i live (especially if you're on att, which my mom thankfully isn't on). i went to network settings: no band toggle. i opened android's advanced network settings menu: tried to gaslight me that this phone doesn't have 4g (i know damn well it does). finally, that first number in your comment that opens HiddenMenu, showed an entry called "NR debug" or something like that. and there it was: "Disable NR". her phone is so much faster now, but idk how long that will persist since some phones change this shit behind your back after like a week.

rantto all the carriers and phone manufacturers: JUST GIVES US THE BUTTONS AND KNOBS. WE KNOW WHAT WE ARE DOING AND FORCING US ON YOUR INFERIOR NETWORK IS NOT GOING TO CONVINCE US IT'S BETTER. 5G/NR IS JUST FUNDAMENTALLY A BAD IDEA TO USE FOR CELLULAR TELEPHONY. i miss the days of lte for internet, gsm/cdma for calls, like it was in 2019 and earlier. modern phones and vintage phones worked alike, and volte was merely an optional enhancement.

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 19 hours ago

5G is fine when comparing with 4G. Just a step up. My issue with them is rather whatever is going on with VoLTE and VoNR. 2G/3G just worked for phone calls, but now you only get that guaranteed by purchasing a phone directly from the carrier. Hell, some carriers even blacklist or whitelist devices just because.
And in Australia phones are now getting blocked completely, even if they worked with VoLTE because the carrier decided they didn't.. Hugh Jeffrey also made a video about that.

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[–] FreddiesLantern@leminal.space 16 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I’m someone who likes to walk the path less traveled in general. And in general I’ve found that people don’t respond well to such things. Especially when you explain them in dept. “Oh they choose to be different huh? => let’s ridicule them to cover up our own insecurities”

I’ve learned through trial, error and ridicule that people need to earn the right to an explanation to these matters.

I’m not gonna explain to Joe Shmoe that I use Linux because I’m doing my part in not giving the uprise in fascism the steady flow of data they want to increase their influence over the world.

They’d never understand. They gotta earn that by proving they care about the topic.

[–] ragas@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 day ago

Yeah something like "Nun of yer business." works well.

Never explain yourself to people who don't want to hear the explanation.

For nicer people something like "Its probably boring to you." can work well. If they insist they can't complain. :D

[–] chunes@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Try not having a phone at all. Those conversations are fun

[–] ragas@lemmy.ml 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

How are you even alive?!

Edit:

[–] eleitl@lemmy.zip 10 points 1 day ago

My GrapheneOS phone is in airplane mode with cellular disabled and WiFi on.

[–] CodenameDarlen@lemmy.world 59 points 1 day ago (7 children)

The sad truth is: you can't talk about online privacy with normal people, they just won't understand, if you try to explain it, they don't care, simple as that! They'll ignore anything you say and probably call you paranoid.

[–] autonomoususer@lemmy.world 1 points 11 hours ago

Totally wrong, skill issue.

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[–] Tenderizer78@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 day ago (2 children)

If you explain yourself, people take that as meaning it's up for debate. Better to say "I like it that way".

I considered swapping to a flip-phone but stopped because I need to be able to access my banking app when near ATM's. My card only ever has the bare minimum amount of money on it so that theft isn't a concern.

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