7
Absolutely fine to say your partner was a cute kid. Nothing creepy at all.
Saying something like "Got any nudes of you at that age?" Now that would be fucking creepy.
Cuteness has nothing to do with sexual attraction. Loads of things are cute. Kittens, puppies, red pandas, baby ducks are some examples of cute things. Basically anything that makes you go "aww" is cute.
If he was asking if you thought he was hot as a kid, that would be weird and you would be right to feel like that is inappropriate.
Right, so..we're not supposed to trying to seduce trash pandas or baby ducks?
Just want to make sure before I do something I might regret.
You are so paranoid, saying a kid looks cute is not tantamount to wanting to sexually abuse them
Basically any response that doesn't include your desire to have birthed them, molest them, or eat them, should be fine.
Also don't ask them for a copy
Even this isn't weird, though. I had an ex who wanted one of my childhood pictures--she had it in a little locket.
You might be overthinking it a little. I think kittens are cute, but that does not mean I want to fuck kittens. Cute ≠ sexual attraction.
In fact, originally the word wasn't even used that way.
If someone says a kitten is cute, do you assume it means they're sexually attracted to it?
Did anyone else read the title and think this was going to be about telling a little white lie because the bf was not a cute child?
Yeah.....
To OP, most kids look like some version of Elmer Fudd. My husband was a fat little shit as a baby/young child (he's tall and skinny now). I poke fun at him for it, a lot. Just like he pokes fun at me for looking exactly like Monchichi as a young kid.
“If 12 year old me knew 12 year old you, she totally would have had a crush on you.”
Do you think kittens are cute?
Do you want to fuck them?
No?
Then there’s nothing wrong with calling cute things cute because “cute” and “sexual” are not the same word or concept.
To me, the issue isn't that you confirming he was cute is inappropriate. As others have stated, kittens are cute, babies are cute, etc, etc. What I find weird is why is he even asking? Why does he care about whether or not you think he was cute at that age? I've shown pics of myself to partners plenty of times and never have I asked them "Was I cute?" Why does he need this type of approval from you on a topic that's irrelevant (he is no longer a child)?
I always remind him that he is cute, it was some playful question, he has a little bit of a goofy personality that I like a lot. He also does many random things. This was some random question, but I didn't really know how to respond.
I don't think it's any different from saying that your newborn is cute or someone's toddler is a cute kid. It has nothing to do with sexual attraction to the child. Now, I don't know if your BF is looking for sexual attraction to his younger self. I'd suggest asking probing questions as to the answer he's looking for. Communication is key to any and all relationships
"I'm not a paedo."
I'm not, just my BF asked me the question while he was looking at his younger pictures, and I didn't know what to say.
OK, serious response then - you seem to be confusing sexual attraction with the adorability of children.
As long as your reply isn't "well I'd smash that!" then you should be fine. Acceptable answers include: "who knew that kid would grow up to be such a spicy meatball as your good self" and "you look adorable" and "I'm glad you outgrew those ears/teeth" (delete where applicable).
Would you tell a 12 year old kid if they were cute?
I don't think so, I don't talk to children in general. Every interaction with children always feels like walking on eggshells so I just say Hi, and stick to common courtesy. I just don't know how to talk to them.
And I think that this is the crux of the weirdness. It isn't strange for people in general to say it, but it is for you. And that is fine.
However, I can see that being hard to explain to someone.
Cute, fine. Hot, no.
Context matters if we're talking about the nuances of the english language.
Cute: Appealing in a pretty or endearing way. Cute: Sexually attractive.
In the right context it's a none issue to call a child cute in an endearing way. This is very common.
If you say it meaning the second definition, you should be locked up in jail.
Obviously in this scenario its fine, because you where asked incontext of an endearing manner (I hope), so the repsonse would also be in an endearing manner (i hope).
You seem to be familiar with only one narrow meaning of that word, while the word means different things and later the meaning that implies sexual attractiveness was added recently and many dictionaries don't even have that definition.
this post was submitted on 03 Aug 2023
7 points (63.0% liked)
No Stupid Questions
35834 readers
1210 users here now
No such thing. Ask away!
!nostupidquestions is a community dedicated to being helpful and answering each others' questions on various topics.
The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:
Rules (interactive)
Rule 1- All posts must be legitimate questions. All post titles must include a question.
All posts must be legitimate questions, and all post titles must include a question. Questions that are joke or trolling questions, memes, song lyrics as title, etc. are not allowed here. See Rule 6 for all exceptions.
Rule 2- Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material.
Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material. You will be warned first, banned second.
Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.
Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.
Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.
That's it.
Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.
Questions which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.
Rule 6- Regarding META posts and joke questions.
Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-question posts using the [META] tag on your post title.
On fridays, you are allowed to post meme and troll questions, on the condition that it's in text format only, and conforms with our other rules. These posts MUST include the [NSQ Friday] tag in their title.
If you post a serious question on friday and are looking only for legitimate answers, then please include the [Serious] tag on your post. Irrelevant replies will then be removed by moderators.
Rule 7- You can't intentionally annoy, mock, or harass other members.
If you intentionally annoy, mock, harass, or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.
Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.
Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.
Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.
Let everyone have their own content.
Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here.
Credits
Our breathtaking icon was bestowed upon us by @Cevilia!
The greatest banner of all time: by @TheOneWithTheHair!
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS