Flightless birds dreaming of bigger things...
this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2023
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Everyone knows what the penguins did. We can not allow them to fly ever again. We will not repeat the sins of the past. This is not only there punishment but our salvation.
Have you seen how much they shit? It’d be like hourly WW2 bombing campaigns if they could fly.
Zoo confirmed that no such position exists. I'm fun at parties.
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/penguins-fall-over-airplanes/
I'm going to start telling chicks at pubs this is what I do at my city's local zoo but I'm not going to exaggerate the flight numbers like this bloke cause I don't want to sound like a workaholic and then later disappoint her.
I'm going to try this one too in my tiny village in the middle of nowhere. I'm straight up just going to claim we have a zoo.
Last time I was at a zoo was Milwaukee. The penguin house was the most foul smelling thing I’d ever inhaled, outside of human gangrene.
I feel bad for that kid. Whatever he’s being paid, it’s not enough.