this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2025
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HistoryPhotos

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[–] flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz 33 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Imagine cops talking about what did they do last week?

  • I caught a murderer, tough case
  • I busted a group of thieves, we were gathering evidence for months
  • ... I measured bathing suits on a beach
[–] acockworkorange@mander.xyz 25 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

I know this is fiction because cops #1 and 2 don't exist.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 14 points 3 weeks ago

they're real. The murderer was a doctor performing an abortion on a rape baby, and the group of thieves were workers caught unionizing and thus attempting to steal profits from their rightful owners.

[–] real_squids@sopuli.xyz 20 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

"I used taxpayer money to subscribe to an onlyfans model to arrest her" (after collecting enough material ofc)

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 25 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

How many more ~~years~~ months before this is en vogue again?

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

there's no way they're actually measuring this time, the cops'll just have an AI spit out a sentencing on the spot.

[–] Sergio@piefed.social 1 points 3 weeks ago
[–] WhatAmLemmy@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

There's still 3 months left in the year

[–] PennyRoyal@sh.itjust.works 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

He’s enjoying that job, look at his face

[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

If not for all the "laws" involved, I'd say he was just sexually harassing that nice lady.

[–] thefluffiest@feddit.nl 13 points 3 weeks ago

Nothing says ‘creep’ quite like a uniformed man officially measuring a woman’s thighs in public

[–] ArseAssassin@sopuli.xyz 7 points 3 weeks ago

Who knew that being a bikini inspector used to be more than just a dream of novelty T-shirt salesmen everywhere.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 4 points 3 weeks ago

lol this is totally not a joke fr fam no cap.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 weeks ago

And in the middle east mullahs are inspecting the lengths of pubic hair.