memes

But where are the mirrors?

The self checkout person always thinks I'm cute and gives me good deals

This thread has made me feel so incredibly millennial.

I'm faster than anyone who works there, and I don't need to worry about long lines (usually the self checkout is the faster option). The time saved is my payment.

"Don't you hate it when you walk into a grocer and they expect you to pick out the items yourself? I don't work here, I just want to say "1 pound of ham and 2 loafs of bread" at the clerk, pay and pick them up. I've been to this new Piggley Wiggly, can't find anything, spent like an hour to find beans. Imagine if I was paid for that time, I would have made 15¢!"

OP in 1925, probably.

I get that you are technically doing someone's job for free, but you can always collect your "pay" by giving yourself a "discount." Personally, I prefer to scan my avacados as potatoes so I can have my avocado toast every day and be able to save up for a house. I'm almost there, it's only gonna take 30 more years for a down payment! 😁😀🙂😐☹️😢😭

oh nooooo, how dare they offer you a convenient option that saves time

if i've learned anything from this thread it's that y'all have awful self-checkouts.

you queue up all you like boss...

I love the self checkout. No bullshit small talk, no customers stood right behind you breathing down your neck and I can pack my shit without feeling better rushed. to me that's invaluable...

You get a discount depending on how you scan.

Meh. I’m usually happy to just scan my own shit and bounce. Even a $500 Costco trip. I usually shop with earbuds in, so it’s just me and some tunes anyway. I just switch off my brain, follow my list, and go.

Wait, is this a thing? What's wrong with you people?

I am definitely not an outgoing or social person, but a big "Thank You" to all those pro-self-checkout folks ITT for making me feel like a social butterfly. I'm gonna brag and annouce I can say, "Hi." and "Thanks" to a cashier like a goddamn boss.

That is if the cashier isn't even more socially awkward/angry at their boss than I am and refuses to talk at all.

Woot! I'm gonna run for office!

Reporter: "Sturger, how are your policies going to improve life for the average voter?"
Me: "Get these goddamn cameras and microphones out of my fucking face. Thanks."

Camera pans as I push my shopping cart out the door like a pro.

We all love to hate on Walmart, but in my part of the world, it's got the closest implementation to what I consider acceptable self-checkouts.

The biggest quality of life feature is that they don't use the the weight sensors in the bagging area. You can use the hand scanner to scan every item in your cart sans weighted produce, as fast as your body will allow.

On the flip side, most of the chain grocery stores in my area have the bagging area scanners that need constant overrides, use AI cameras that lock up after every third item and require an override each time, slow machines that seem to have to compute the pi to the 10 sextillionth digit after each item is scanned before it will be ready for you to place it in the bagging area, and things of that nature. Those suck for sure.