this post was submitted on 13 Apr 2025
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Star Trek

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/c/StarTrek: Your safe harbored Spacedock in these Stellar Seas!

Fire up the inertial dampeners, retract all moorings and clear space dock. It's time to boldy go where no one has gone before!

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TORRES: Ah, ha. Gotcha. Why don't we reassess those probabilities together, okay? Remember how we used to play hypothetical games?

DREADNOUGHT: Affirmative.

TORRES: Let's play one now. Here's a hypothetical situation for you. Suppose I've been telling you the truth all along, and you really are in the Delta quadrant.

DREADNOUGHT: Probability of being in the Delta quadrant, seventy five thousand light years from last confirmed location, is negligible.

TORRES: Hypothetical, Dreadnought. It's a game, remember? Assume it's true for a moment.

DREADNOUGHT: Assumption entered.

TORRES: And we're heading for the wrong target.

DREADNOUGHT: Assumption entered.

TORRES: Millions of innocent people about to die when you detonate.

DREADNOUGHT: Assumption entered.

TORRES: Now, explain to me how this might happen.

DREADNOUGHT: If key sensor programmes were damaged or deleted, databanks would be compromised.

TORRES: Just for the fun of it, let's have a look at those databanks. See if anything looks at all compromised.

(A display comes up on a wall monitor.)

TORRES: Is this a complete file directory? There seem to be a few missing.

DREADNOUGHT: Files containing information about the weapons or tactical systems are not necessary to verify sensor accuracy.

TORRES: Oh, I'm hurt you don't trust me. Hold on, pause the display. What's that? Computer, identify the Cardassian file on screen.

DREADNOUGHT: Unable to identify.

TORRES: Looks like a back-up file. Computer, when was this file created?

DREADNOUGHT: Stardate 46437.5

TORRES: I believe that was before you and I ever met.

DREADNOUGHT: Hypothetical game terminated. Probability reassessment complete.

TORRES: A new conclusion?

DREADNOUGHT: Affirmative. Probability of being in the Delta quadrant remains negligible. When that option is rejected, new probability assessment indicates that you have changed loyalties, B'Elanna. You are now cooperating with the Cardassian Federation Alliance as described in the treaty of 2367, a treaty which has been rejected by the Maquis.

TORRES: Dreadnought.

DREADNOUGHT: Humanoid life support aboard this vessel has been terminated. Approaching target at full impulse. Stage one alert has been activated. Initiating final detonation sequence.

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[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Sounds about right. Limited ability to consider fringe scenarios, quick to return to previous assessment, and subroutines prone to eliminating organic life. Just another day.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Then it detonates half a billion km from the planet because some rando on Cardassian Reddit claimed the target planet was the size of a red giant.

[–] cuchi@startrek.website 2 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I think I'm missing a meme here.

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 2 days ago

Referencing the Google AI searches that suggest adding glue to pizza or suggesting eatting one small rock per day is healthy because sarcastic reddit posts somehow got weighted highly by the generative model.

[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

A lot of AI searches, at least through Google, tend to throw in suggested answers via Reddit. Many of them are in no way related or helpful, hence my meme response (gonna use it as a post tomorrow).

[–] eldavi@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 days ago

This was my first full episode of Star Trek and you've made me realize that I've turned into B'Elanna since I have to use copilot and chatgpt to do my job. Lol