So much for separation of church and state LMAO

These people are treasonous and need to be treated as such

Illegal. Christian fascists will lose.

All kids show up in satanic clothing

"OK kids, here's everything the Bible gets wrong..."

"Wait... not like that..."

Numbers 22:

21 Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the Moabite officials. 22 But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the Lord stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him. 23 When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, it turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat it to get it back on the road.

24 Then the angel of the Lord stood in a narrow path through the vineyards, with walls on both sides. 25 When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it pressed close to the wall, crushing Balaam’s foot against it. So he beat the donkey again.

26 Then the angel of the Lord moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. 27 When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat it with his staff. 28 Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth, and it said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?”

29 Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If only I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.”

30 The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?”

“No,” he said.

31 Then the Lord opened Balaam’s eyes, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.

32 The angel of the Lord asked him, “Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me.[a] 33 The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If it had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared it.”

34 Balaam said to the angel of the Lord, “I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back.”

“As you can see kids, the donkey represents the working class, Balaam represents the wealthy, and the Lord represents law. Whenever capitalism runs afoul of the law, the workers do the right thing while the rich respond by beating the working class. This goes on until until they’re confronted by the courts, at which point they make an insincere apology and learn nothing. And this is the core value upon which our entire economic system was founded.

“Also, note that Balaam’s first response in the story is to argue with the donkey rather than say, ‘Holy shit! A talking donkey!’ That represents religious idiots’ willingness to about the stupidest things imaginable without a moment of hesitation.”

This will surely be challenged in court.

Cue an avalanche of lawsuits...

I fucked up last night, and set my alarm for 1824

"The Bible is a fictional book written by old men about a pretend wandering magician, selectively published by other biased old men, and it contains 10 commandments that if not obeyed, the magician's father/self/spirit will have you tortured for all eternity because he's unstable. You can pay money and ask for forgiveness to not be tortured though, so it's cool."

Boom, requirement met.

This is the best summary I could come up with:

All Oklahoma schools are required to incorporate the Bible and the Ten Commandments in their curriculums, effective immediately, the state’s chief education officer announced in a memorandum Thursday.

The Oklahoma memorandum follows a law in Louisiana passed June 19, that requires all public classrooms to display the Ten Commandments.

A group of Louisiana parents and civil rights organizations are suing the state over the new law, contending the legislation violates both US Supreme Court precedent and the First Amendment.

This is not merely an educational directive but a crucial step in ensuring our students grasp the core values and historical context of our country.”

The new memo comes after the Oklahoma Supreme Court blocked an effort to establish the first publicly funded religious charter school in the country.

The court on Tuesday ordered the state to rescind its contract with St. Isidore of Seville Catholic Virtual School in a 6-2 decision with one recusal.

The original article contains 496 words, the summary contains 146 words. Saved 71%. I'm a bot and I'm open source!

There's nothing wrong with that:

1. No false gods. Anyone who demands your worship can fuck off.
2. No idols. If someone wants you to worship an idol, they're bad.
3. Meh. I don't think god really cares about this.
4. Don't work on the weekends.
5. You're not dead, so your parents did the bare minimum. Give them a break.
6. Don't kill anyone you dumb fuck!
7. Don't cheat on people.
8. Don't fuckkin take shit.
9. Don't fuckkin lie.
10. Stay in your fuckkin lane.

Easy.

I hope the kids aren't so indoctrinated, they can't argue about the contradictions, hypocrisy and sheer evil of the Canite war god and his amoral warmongering followers.