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this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2024
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No Stupid Questions
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No such thing. Ask away!
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Eh, for me it's maybe twenty minutes at most, but I don't do fights with people I care about. If things are reaching the point where voices are raised, it's time to step back and figure out why things are going bad, then come back to the subject matter from a place of love.
As far as how long it should take for you and your partner, it depends on how each of you handled things. There's no single answer to it. The nastier the other person gets, the harder it is to let go, even when the issue that started the fight gets resolved. It becomes about the behavior during the fight, and that's a separate thing to get over.
You both would benefit from extra guidance by professional in anger management and negotiating relationships. If you're fighting like that often enough to be asking this, neither of you has the skills needed to be healthy for each other.