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my mental health has been getting worse (vent)
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Personally I would not be able to call those people friends. In addition to being, you know, extremely offensive, hearing people use slurs like that is dehumanizing and invalidating. I would encourage you to either get other friends or have frank discussions with your current ones about boundaries and what they can and can't say to you.
You may not be in a situation where it is practical to do that. If it is practical, don't let confidence be what stops you.
Thing is I'm not out to them and don't plan to come out. Basically this is the average situation. This happened some time ago. So a "friend" of mine decided to hug me and felt the need to point out that in his words translated to English "this is a hug of friends not of (fslur)"
I'm kinda lonely tbh don't know what to do