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I think it's about how perfect and unique each application has to be. But there is only so much variation I can make.
I also think it's about the bureaucracy itself, if something goes wrong I should have known. Always. because we don't have civil service liability (as I understand it).
It's like this whole thing gives me anxiety.
So it sounds like maybe your issues are a) needing to challenge your mental rules about the effort that is/isn't required for the application and b) accepting things that are outside of your control.
For your first issue, why does every application have to be perfect and unique? Yes the general recommendation is to tailor your resume/CV for each role, but if that is causing you so much stress you can't even apply then don't. Maybe it would be better to come up with a template you can use for each application. For instance if you are applying for are cashier, server, and front desk type roles maybe you just have a template for each of those roles that you can shoot off when you come across a job that you want to apply for. Don't let perfection be the enemy of good.
For the second one, that's tough. At the end of the day you really have to accept that you can't predict everything. Sometimes things just don't work out, and the best you can do is use it as a learning experience for the next time. If you can't manage this on your own with your anxiety, then I second @fodderoh's suggestion for seeking out a therapist.
I've been told multiple times things like:
Side note: For a while, I had a red panda drawn on my cv in a desperate attempt to be unique, I was quite proud and everyone said it was good. A few years later I think it's ugly af and I even feel a bit of shame for using it. It feels like everyone lied about it looking good.
I hope the second one will calm down as I get used to being in this system and I know how it will be. I'm having a "start-up" meeting next week.
I wonder if some of your issue is that you are taking the standard advice beyond what is intended. I'm not sure if this will help or hurt with your anxiety issues, but you might want to look up the Ask a Manager blog. She has lots of great resources around developing a good resume, cover letter, and interview tips. Especially in terms of the examples she provides which could be helpful for you to process how to make yourself stand out in a good way.
Best of luck with your meeting next week!