this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2023
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] citrussy_capybara@hexbear.net 39 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Getting to triple-dip into xiyuan, putinrubles, and sorosbucks was too tempting. Hexbear only accepts trans communists, so that’s what I became. While taking medical transition steps isn’t necessary to be trans, it helped with getting into character. Some people claim it’s “gender euphoria” but I attribute it to the satisfaction of committing to the bit to mislead the libs. I got along well with another pretend trans poster, and the DMs turned into a full-blow performative t4t relationship. Eventually we moved in together to stretch the botmoney further. We started a family to pass on the communist bit to a new generation. We never stopped posting. 4 kids and 12 grandchildren later, A wrecker I could not defeat came for me. Cancer. In hospice, surrounded by my loved ones, chosen family, and circle of friends, they asked me what final wisdom I wanted to pass on before handing me the morphine button.

“Haha, you all fell for it you rubes! I was faking it this whole time. I wasn’t actually fighting for the liberation of marginalised people and the working class. I hate you all!”

I mash the button while holding my partner’s hand, who congratulates me on the historic bit but calls me a lib for ruining kayfabe. I die in shame.

[–] alexandra_kollontai@hexbear.net 4 points 2 years ago

I NEED this as a tagline or something. it's to good to lie in this comment section forever