this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2026
34 points (100.0% liked)

Mental Health

7271 readers
78 users here now

Welcome

This is a safe place to discuss, vent, support, and share information about mental health, illness, and wellness.

Thank you for being here. We appreciate who you are today. Please show respect and empathy when making or replying to posts.

If you need someone to talk to, @therapygary@lemmy.blahaj.zcan be reached on Signal at TherapyGary13.12.

Rules

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

  1. No promoting paid services/products.
  2. Be kind and civil. No bigotry/prejudice either.
  3. No victim blaming. Nor giving incredibly simplistic solutions (i.e. You have ADHD? Just focus easier.)
  4. No encouraging suicide, no matter what. This includes telling someone to commit homicide as "dragging them down with you".
  5. Suicide note posts will be removed, and you will be reached out to in private.
  6. If you would like advice, mention the country you are in. (We will not assume the US as the default.)

If BRIEF mention of these topics is an important part of your post, please flag your post as NSFW and include a (trigger warning: suicide, self-harm, death, etc.)in the title so that other readers who may feel triggered can avoid it. Please also include a trigger warning on all comments mentioning these topics in a post that was not already tagged as such.

Partner Communities

To partner with our community and be included here, you are free to message the current moderators or comment on our pinned post.

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
Mountainaire@lemmy.world
givesomefucks@lemmy.world
34
I've been having a sort of "midlife crisis" and I don't know where to go from here. I don't know what I want in life. Would appreciate some perspective/advice. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by dingus@lemmy.world to c/mentalhealth@lemmy.world
31 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

I'm in my early 30s, so not necessarily "mid-life", but I think what I have been experiencing can be described this way. I went through a lot this past year, and it has both left some large scars as well as healed some other aspects and caused new ways of thinking in others. I've tried new things and enjoyed the things that I've tried.

But I feel like I need something "more", but I have no idea what that is. I keep getting caught on the horrifying realization of life being fleeting and I want to do something to make it more whole. But I can't outrun death so I don't know that anything is left to be done. But I feel like I need something to fill that space. I may in fact be chasing something that doesn't exist idk.

I guess I just feel a bit lost and would appreciate some direction.

More about me that may or may not influence your advice: I've always been a loner and the sort of "terminally online" type. I don't experience sexual attraction, so it sort of puts most options of relationships out the window. Asexual "dating" is not as prevalent or simple as you'd think. My career is very solid and I'm paid very well, so I'm not interested in switching careers. My career was a huge source of my trauma this past year, but I have made a lot of progress since and it's really not something I can easily change. I have discovered new and healthier forms of self-expression and have done new things. I own where I live and would not be able to sell it for as much as I paid for it either, which is another reason I'd be against moving. I am physically close-ish to family and visit every couple of weeks.

Thanks all for listening.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] ashenone@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

So that's why I'm satisfied with that particular part.

It's good you recognize thr parts of your life you are satisfied with.

As far as my own experience goes I had a good union engineering job, but woke up every day feeling like I was wasting my life. So I saved up, quit my job and sold most of my stuff, bought a truck and trailer and traveled for the better parts of two years. I stayed off the grid and lived very simply, enjoyed hiking and being outdoors, and did a lot of reading. I ended up moving in with family when I ran out of money and found a real passion volunteering at an animal shelter. A full time position opened up at the shelter and I applied and got the job. I don't even miss the money or comfort of my own place at this point. I've also rediscovered a love for a few hobbies I had as a teenager and have the energy to pursue them now that I'm not working a job that's mentally draining me

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's such an amazing journey! Thank you so much for sharing!

One of my online friends decided she was done with regular life and managed to go off grid herself. I'm a bit of a wuss in need of more modern conveniences lolol.

For the period of time I was on FMLA, I did contemplate quitting my job and trying to get one full time at the food pantry, honestly. Working for the community like that has its own sense of fulfillment, so I'm glad you found yours at the animal shelter.

[–] ashenone@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Sounds like the food pantry was a passion for you, and while it's tough with a lot of volunteer opportunities being business hours you could always do some anarchy food distribution on the weekends. Give out jars of peanut butter and loaves of bread to the homeless in your area. Organizations make it nice and simple but there's nothing (maybe laws but fuck those laws) saying you can't do it on your own. Good luck on your search for meaning, I hope you find what your looking for from life