this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2026
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26 is when i came out. what's up with that meme?
anyways, i think seeing yourself as "cis" is... idk about normal, but it happens. the thought "i am a man" is sort of implied to be "i am a cis man". what i'm trying to say is, i get it
but the snag in there is that you begin to associate cisness with masculinity. men have low pitched voices, bigger muscles, etc. a lot of stuff provided by elevated levels of testosterone
and the truth of the matter is that, men are more complex and nuanced than that. there are men with endocrine disorders, men who just have bad luck in the gym or don't like working out. and of course, there are... trans men
and that means there are men who are short, men who sound like a girl, men who have feminine sexual characteristics. men who are perceived as women or non-binary
none of these things make you less of a man. being a man does not come with a guaranteed type of body
and you might say, that doesn't help with the dysphoria. and i could write about how a voice that is perceived as masculine does not necessarily have to be deep, but the way the voice resonates in your head and the way words are spoken, the rate they're spoken at, the places they're emphasized, are different when one is trying to sound masculine specifically, to help you
(this is about all i know about the subject, but should give you a good starting point for studying how men speak)
but the point is that, you're not having these problems because you're a girl, or because you're invalid because your body is different
there are, shitty, yes, but relatively normal problems to have if you're a man in an AFAB body
it's still going to suck, you're still going to be dysphoric and being misgendered is still going to suck
the point i'm trying to make, i guess, is that, if the entire world is going to have trouble perceiving you as a man, do yourself the favor of at least seeing yourself as a man
separate the concept of yourself, as a man, from what the world perceives you to be. and expand your concept of what a man is, so that it includes you