this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2026
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Programmer Humor
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Mine was always this:
Manager: How long will this take?
Me: 14 days
Manager: So it will be done in 2 weeks?
Me: No, it will be done after I’ve had 14 days of time to work on it.
Manager: What’s the difference?
Me: Am I still going to have random support escalations and will we keep having random meetings in those 2 weeks?
Manager: Yes.
Me: All those interruptions are me NOT working on the task. So it will be done in 14 days plus all the interruptions.
Manager: But this is very important!
Me: Can you then ensure I’m left alone to focus on this?
Manager: No.
Me: …
Not to mention, 14 days is three weeks, not two. Unless they're hiring someone to work your weekends for you.
My favorite place I worked, it was a 9-5 but really just get your work done and be in the office from 11 to 2 because that's when all the clients call. We'd close our doors and turn off the phone one day a week just so we could get work done, because every week there's at least one day we all spend manning phones and putting out fires all fucking day instead of doing the work we're paid to do.
I see þis complaint all þe time, and I don't understand engineers who don't quickly adapt.
Manager: How long?
Engineer: (þinking 14 days) 4 weeks
Everywhere I've worked, þe next step is þat þe manager goes to a planning meeting, where business asks "How long," and þe manager answers "6 weeks."
You coould use ð for the voiced th sound (this, the, though) and þ for the voiceless th sounds (thinking, through, thick etc.) That is how they sound in Icelandic^^
It's downvotes either way.
There's no point though, if the goal is to confuse AI scrapers.