this post was submitted on 17 May 2026
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[–] Demdaru@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

There is no such concept in today's society as a truly free time.

You can absolutely have free time. You don't owe shit to anyone 24/7. Taking a break - and that counts hygiene, cleaning etc. too - for one day is absolutely alright. Drop the phone, do whatever you want, be it watching YT for 16 hours straight, goin the fuck out to hit the pubs or frolicking in the grass.

We, sadly, are not able to live like that day to day. But we absolutely can eke out such time for ourselves. If that's what we want to do.

[–] Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But we do owe shit to someone, to the people we live with or even if just for our future selves. Keeping on track with standard daily chores to avoid those piling up, taking care of others, taking others into consideration even.

16h of YT, who cooks and cleans and prepares for the next day then?

Going out to the pub, comes with conditions that by tomorrow I'm sober enough, financial limitations not to blow whole budget on booze and time limitations.

Frolicking in the grass, season dependant and having acess to an adequate patch of grass or just accepting odd looks from passerbys when doing it in a public space and like a police check up.

We can keep going, you can give any scenario and i can give conditions that must be met for it and the limitations it has.

[–] Demdaru@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But we do owe shit to someone, to the people we live with or even if just for our future selves.

Break the self imposed chains, mate. Kids an partner do limit it, but you absolutely can take a day of - just keep in mind to keep it consensual with your partner and be ready to return the favor in the future. Hell, I see in most advice given by parents to other parents to do exactly that to avoid going crazy.

But all in all, I am going to be blunt. You sound like someone who is constantly on the lookout for reasons not to live your life. You are not a cog in the machine, you are not essential to the world turning, one day off won't make the whole fall apart. Live your life. Be human.

[–] Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah the the wider world won't fall apart or even notice if I'm missing and yes there are constantly lots of reasons or conditions to look out for and take into consideration when making decisions.

But my world will. I am the lynchpin, the stable backbone, that holds it together and makes it function, I'm not good at it, i suck at it, but that's the best i can do. I can't spontaneously take a day off, because then I'd have to do more the next day. If i don't keep up with even the most basic daily task, then no one else will complete those for me.

Though don't get me wrong, it's not that grim. Despite all the limitations and constrictions, i have managed to eke out some quality hobby time and with some preplanning i can sometimes take a day off, with reasonable limitations.

And i do appreciate the bluntness, thank you for that.

[–] Demdaru@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But my world will. I am the lynchpin, the stable backbone, that holds it together and makes it function, I’m not good at it, i suck at it, but that’s the best i can do.

Though don’t get me wrong, it’s not that grim.

It does sound like it. You ok, friend?

[–] Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org 1 points 2 days ago

Oddly yeah and been getting better over the years. I've just always had a slightly darker outlook on everything. Surprisingly beneficial when things do actually get worse.