Oh lol I go off on a tangent don't I. I started talking about the language, then just traumadunped.

Anyway so like Finns use passive voice all the time, it's sort of built in. And no-one really calls each other by their name. And if people use my name it's sort of childishly in third person "oh I wonder if Dasus would want to do x/y" even when it was just a 3 person chat with me and my brothers. So annoying. And we call people "it" all the time. Using the formal "hän" is like for official language (and pets, pets get the respectable form).

But yeah it's hard to convey how much distancing language there is inherently built into Finnish language. And I think that's the problem. Especially because I tend to think in English and have done since I started being more or less fluent like 20 years ago. Nowadays it's practically all English. Also the reason I have an English therapist. (They are accredited psychologists in Finland and fluent in Finnish but we've never spoken Finnisj with them) (and i use the neutral pronoun just because I don't need to specify I don't think. Also Finnish btw doesn't have gendered pronouns or really anything gendered, except in terms of some loan words)