this post was submitted on 04 Apr 2026
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Obviously fake. It's flat earth, not flat moon!
Also, because we experience gravity, we know there must be a giant thruster on the underside of the earth. I know people love the elegant simplicity of a giant earth coin floating in space but it just doesn't stand up to basic scrutiny.
That's not how gravity works. It works because the turtle wills it
I have no patience for single-turtle hypothesists. What would it even push against? It doesn't make sense. Now, if it were an infinite stack of turtles, each pushing against each other an infinitesimal amount, it could generate a constant 9.8m/s^2, so I don't think we can rule out the many-turtles hypothesis. But I still think the simplest explanation is the most likely, and that is a giant rocket booster.
Unless... a single turtle had four rocket boosters instead of flippers... that could work. Hold on, I need to diagram this out with some red yarn.
TYL.