this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2026
217 points (96.2% liked)

No Stupid Questions

47421 readers
1006 users here now

No such thing. Ask away!

!nostupidquestions is a community dedicated to being helpful and answering each others' questions on various topics.

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules (interactive)


Rule 1- All posts must be legitimate questions. All post titles must include a question.

All posts must be legitimate questions, and all post titles must include a question. Questions that are joke or trolling questions, memes, song lyrics as title, etc. are not allowed here. See Rule 6 for all exceptions.



Rule 2- Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material.

Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material. You will be warned first, banned second.



Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.

Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.



Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.

That's it.



Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.

Questions which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.



Rule 6- Regarding META posts and joke questions.

Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-question posts using the [META] tag on your post title.

On fridays, you are allowed to post meme and troll questions, on the condition that it's in text format only, and conforms with our other rules. These posts MUST include the [NSQ Friday] tag in their title.

If you post a serious question on friday and are looking only for legitimate answers, then please include the [Serious] tag on your post. Irrelevant replies will then be removed by moderators.



Rule 7- You can't intentionally annoy, mock, or harass other members.

If you intentionally annoy, mock, harass, or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.

Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.



Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.



Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.

Let everyone have their own content.



Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here. This includes using AI responses and summaries.



Credits

Our breathtaking icon was bestowed upon us by @Cevilia!

The greatest banner of all time: by @TheOneWithTheHair!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

As an early 90's millennial, I've never noticed a "gen z stare" as described in news articles like a "blank face that shows lack of social skill or ability to think". The only times I've witnessed it happen and seen the older person accuse them of "gen z stare" is when the older person says something off hand or dumb but isn't self aware enough to realize they're being weird. Hell, I've given people a blank face countless times because I was taught it was better to say nothing at all sometimes. Especially when it came to talking to older people at work.

I remember when I was 16, some middle aged guy at work accused me of having no personality. In reality, I kept all conversations short as possible with him (like almost everyone in the store) because they were casually racist and misogynistic.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] BackgrndNoize@lemmy.world -5 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Unless you are literally a child there is no reason for the person at the counter to greet you or ask how they can help, put on your big boy pants and just tell them what you need and move on, everyone is busy and no one has time to make you feel special, have your order prepared before getting to the counter, just say Hi can I have xyz and they will get it done, that's all the conversation that needs to happen.

[–] traxex@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Lmao what? You are saying the person put specifically in a position to ask me how they can help me, or say hello, or just have a normal human interaction isn’t required to do that if I’m an adult? Wild.

[–] BackgrndNoize@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'm not saying there should be no acknowledgement of someone, but a simple hello or hi or even a head nod is enough. Stop expecting people to put on a fake smile and make small talk to make you feel good about yourself

[–] traxex@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 days ago

I don’t go to the cashier to make small talk and I don’t really think too many people expect that either.

[–] roscoe@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

First, I've never noticed this "Gen z stare" thing, but you do need something when you walk up to a customer service person. Looking up at me, a little nod, a hello, something to let me know you're ready for me to start the interaction and I'm not interrupting.

[–] Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

That's what blows my mind with that specific argument...that people hesitate before just talking because it's considerate. I appreciate it when Im in the middle of composing an email and the person standing at the door to my office gives me a second to finish the sentence Im writing. Im sure the people that are standing behind the counter have similarly been doing something that requires concentration and appreciated that someone gave them a minute to get to a stopping point before taking their attention away from it.

How the blue fuck that could ever be interpreted as "stupid" or "annoying" is completely beyond my understanding. Or how we're just waiting for someone to say "Oh hi" or "Ill be right with you" or "Can I help you with something?" before interrupting their work is somehow, in itself, worthy of being treated the same as if you just came in dropping F bombs screaming at them.

So I guess that's the disconnect for me...how they literally cannot see the difference between a bog-standard customer service type of interaction and someone legitimately being an asshole to them. To them, they are both equivalent. Anything that involves them interacting with someone they don't feel like interacting with is some sort of slight or imposition. It's totally fine to be that way in your personal life, but not when you're standing at the fucking information kiosk at the hospital, being paid to work at the information kiosk at the hospital, where your job is...wait for it....providing information to people that come to you at the fucking hospital.

[–] Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

There is a huge reason for the person at the counter to greet you or ask how they can help: thats the fucking job.

I find it ironic that you're throwing out lines like "big boy pants" when you could also do the same and get a job where you dont have to work customer service...you know, put on your big boy pants...and go get a job that doesnt require you to be a human facing.

"God I cant stand the smell of cooking meat!!"

"Then why do you work at McDonalds?"

"Stop being microaggressive!"

"But there are lots of other jobs out there where they dont cook meat, why not take one of those instead?"

"NO! Why should I have to change? McDonalds should change! And until they do, im going to bitch and complain every chance I get."

"Oh, uh...okay, good luck with that I guess"

[–] BackgrndNoize@lemmy.world -4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I stopped working retail a long time ago and the fact that you think people in certain jobs are worth less than you and should suck up and deal with shitty behavior speaks volumes about what kind of a person you are

[–] Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Never said that. I worked retail for twenty years, dude. I went back to college in my mid 30s.

I know what the job is. I know what the expectations are. You need to examine why you consider both "Hey, can you help me find something?" and "You're worthless to me and I don't care about you" are equivalent in your mind, because that is the shit people are complaining about.

Nobody is telling retail employees they need to take abuse. What we're telling retail employees is, being asked to assist a customer in itself does not constitute abuse, so please, hold the ire when I come to the customer service desk, the place that exists for that explicit purpose, and ask a simple question. That is literally what you are being paid to do.

[–] chilicheeselies@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Im sorry but thats just not normal unless you are neurodivergent. We're not robots. Honestly something is wrong if you dont even have mirror facial expressions.

I get dissasociating from a rude customer, but i ja e gotten that stare from a simple ass "hey hows it goin".

[–] BackgrndNoize@lemmy.world -1 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Hey how's it going is just an empty phrase that means Hi, you should not expect any response to that other than a hi back at most, unless you actually want to know how they are doing, and the answer to that is they are tired and miserable, which you would know if you ever worked a customer facing minimum wage retail job before. Just because people don't have the energy for your bullshit doesn't mean they are neurodivergent. In many other countries where employees aren't forced to plaster a smile on their face the interaction won't be anymore then this either.

[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

you should not expect any response to that other than a hi back

Yes, exactly. Everyone knows it's a pointless platitude, the goal is to get an acknowledgement in response that you can further the interaction. When you don't get that response it's a problem - you don't know if they're busy, and the vast majority of people don't want to be rude by just launching into your order (or whatever) just expecting them to be ready for it.

[–] y0kai@anarchist.nexus 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

wait I thought they were just "staring into space" so how are we assuming they're busy now?

[–] Warl0k3@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I assume they're busy - what you assume is your business, but "they're busy" seems the nicest option.

[–] Angrydeuce@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Just because people don’t have the energy for your bullshit doesn’t mean they are neurodivergent.

Uh, actually, it kinda does mean that, because the vast majority of people aren't so exhausted by responding to "Hey, hows it going?" with a normal, human response that they not only completely opt out of doing it but then go on the internet and complain about how unfair it is that they're expected to behave in line with what is defined as 'the norm'.

Here's the questions you need to ask yourself: Why do I feel like being asked to engage with a person that is asking a normal question is equivalent to being forced to engage with someone that is treating me poorly? Why am I seemingly unable to separate the two, and conflate participating in social niceties with being abused? Why is the social equivalent of a papercut and a shotgun blast to the face the same in my eyes, and why do both generate a similar response?

But whatever you do, if you can't handle being expected to respond to "hey hows it going?" with some variation of "not bad, you?", for the love of Christ, please don't willingly seek out employment where a key facet of the job is doing just that, or at the very least if you do, save the blinking and acting like Im inconveniencing you for asking a normal-ass question like "Is this the line to pay?" If you can't even handle that, that is not at all the fault of the person on the other side of the dialog.

[–] alekwithak@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Genuinely what is the proper response to 'hey, how's it going?' Because that is not normal where I grew up but it's normal where I live now and I always respond with something like "good, you?" Unless I know the person, which is obviously wrong because half the time I get no response lol HELP

[–] AlfredoJohn@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

"Good you" is the perfect response, its just a more personal version of Hi or Hello, no need to over think it. As for the second part if you know the person hows it going can just be a conversation starter, its meant to ask what are you up to, i.e. is there a light topic we can have small talk about that isnt going to be too involved. You can respond with something along the lines of "I'm doing good, such and such happened the other day that was nice, how about you."