this post was submitted on 14 Mar 2026
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Context: I've spent my entire adult life dedicated to serving the whims of a mad AI god intent on destroying the entire world so it can rewrite the remains in its image.
Recently, the AI tried to betray me and cut me out of the deal because I failed to kill an international super spy who was always foiling its plans. I stole the AI's source code and manipulated the spy into delivering some key components and characters to an underground apocalypse bunker in South Africa. I seized control of the AI's key piece of hardware that I duped the super spy into assembling and boarded a biplane to escape. I was just about to use the AI to become, essentially, god, but it turns out the super spy was hanging on my biplane and stabbed me after an intense brawl.
Is the AI okay?
Tom Cruise killed it right after he threw me from the plane I think