this post was submitted on 15 Feb 2026
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Is that with everybody or just people you don't know and feel comfortable with? I mean, I'm intensely uncomfortable in many social situations but my kids don't trigger that response at all. Which is not to say it's all fun and games. They are immensely hard work and the choices you have about how you spend your time, what holidays or other leisure activities you do, tend to be dictated by the presence of kids. Even if it's something you do to take time off from the kids, that's still driven by the kids in a way. It's a whole different set of priorities, though I don't regret having them at all.
I very likely have some type of undiagnosed disorder which I will never really know for sure because I don't have the patience, energy or money to get a diagnosis. There are definitely people out there with similar peculiarities to me who are great at raising kids. I just don't want to take the chance and hope for the best when there is no guarantee that I'll be one of the good ones. I'll rather end up an old lady with a couple of regrets than I want to potentially fuck up someone's childhood.
I get where you're coming from! It IS hard work! I have seen it in the faces and voices of my friends and family for decades haha. But I also see the love and how much these kids bring to their parents' lives. So I totally get what you mean, when you say that your kids don't affect you the same way other people do. To me that just sounds like you're one of the good eggs :D
Thanks, but I think what it really means is that the way you relate to your kids is not like anyone else. Like I never imagined that I would be ok with cleaning up another person's shit. People working in nursing homes handle that stuff every day but I just couldn't. But when it's your own kid, it's just... different. Still objectively disgusting but somehow acceptable, in the same way that I'm ok with wiping my own ass because it's a part of me. Well, in some way my kids are a part of me too.